Feminism is not a dirty word. Feminism means having a vagina
and a vagina is not an invitation. Our body is not an invitation. That doesn’t
mean we cannot still take pride of long legs, shapely calves. It’s totally our call to wear flattering necklines,
accentuate our waist, or butt.
I refuse to pack chilli powder in my hand bag each time I
step out of the house. I will not buy the advice of mastering martial arts or
acquire cans of pepper spray - ‘just in case’. Why am I to do it? Is the equality only in the
words not in the society? Do I need to fear the opposite sex when I am equally competing
in every field? Do my male friends really need extra humanity lessons to be
humans?
The streets,
stations, subways, buses, autos, trains, over bridges, cabs belong to women as
much as they do to men. We reclaim what is rightfully ours, without being
browbeaten into scampering away in fright. Why retreat at this stage? If
anything, the moment to go ahead and change the rules of this dastardly game is
now. If we weaken our resolve and move even an inch from the position taken,
we’ll have surrendered a basic right. The right to freedom. The right to
safety.
It was quite shocking when my German friend who happened to
be in India and asked me about how safe is it for people to settle in Delhi
with regards to the Delhi rape case.
Is the answer to that is a female foetus is not safe even in
a mother’s womb? And are we discussing the safety of women as those who are
‘allowed to live’? But this is not the
time to feel martyred. There is no room for self-pity. This is the time to
demand real change.
The solution lies in our hands. And those hands need not
reach for chilli powder. If we adopt defensive strategies to ‘protect’
ourselves, we are admitting weakness and anticipating defeat. How many women in
scary circumstances will have the physical strength and the presence of mind to
reach for those chilies? The onus of staying safe was never on us. Let’s not
foolishly take it on ourselves at this critical stage and let the real culprits
off the hook. And those culprits aren’t the rapists. Criminals take their cues
from society at large. A society that disregards and looks the other way when
politicians rape, loot, kidnap and murder with liberty, is a society that is
inviting trouble. Men like the Delhi rapists who must have believed they’d get
away with the crime – just like all those govt. body whizzing around the capital,
followed by a convoy of security cars to ‘protect’ them. It is this blatant
abuse of power that we need to put up a fight against. Until those changes,
women will remain soft targets. Through
all this, an extraordinarily courageous woman continues to fight for her life
and let the world know she wants to live. It’s a poignant war cry from what
could soon become her death bed. Yes. The situation is grim. And this is a
national emergency which must be recognized as one. No woman in India should
ever be told to arm herself with chilli powder. No woman should even feel the
need to do so. This is what the fight is about. Women must be able to take
safety for granted. Just like men do.
For, when Delhi gets raped, India gets raped.
Are we grown up to be flame of the house or being flamed for
the male desperation?
“Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen
to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then
listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”
-Shel Silverstein
Credits: Shobaa De
