Quarter Life Crises!

Well, it has been quite a crazy fortnight. I have been travelling, counselling, consulting and giving some random presentations. Basically I was busy. In this time, I almost got in touch with some very cool people, some long lost friends jus appeared from nowhere and few surprising characters. All in common is the fad of mushing life.

Now it seems that we have got the maturity. IDK what that means but I am sure the ass under got a year older and heart somewhere got little brain or the life got a poetic touch.

Life is good. Life is great. Life is unbelievable.  Life is hard. Life is cruel. Life is so beautiful. Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!

At once I felt it is like the sunny sides up for a few days that mysteriously turn into those dark gloomy clouds that none wants to go under. Those ranting earthlings! They and their flawed decisions. They and their blunders. They and their silly decisions. The more I seem to talk to people, interact with them and be a part of their lives, the more I seem to make observations, the more I seem to take random calls on their decisions, the more I come to a concrete truth.

There is no absolute truth. Today you do something with uncontrolled optimism for silly fun; tomorrow it would be the greatest flaw of life. Well, no regrets though.

I just understood that there is no friend who stays for long or has a person who understands you completely. This little misjudgements lead to breaking off friendships or betrayal. Both as a combo is even more painful.

Well, late 2012 and early 2013 has been a year of marriages for all my friends of 23-28 age groups. A conflict of thoughts for love or arranged love marriages. Few marrying their bfs and few struggling to get their families convinced on their bf and few compromising to get something else. On the other hand is this thrashing ambition. A decent job holder wants a better job; the better one wants a best one. And this is the blockage for settlement. Well, in other terms getting married. Now the definition of family also seems to be redefined.

You feel obsolete for the absolute fun. Fear of calories, fear of hair fall or the fear of looking aged. Fear of having a class and fear of your reputation. Fear of world and then comes the hypocrisy.

Seems like the world is pouring out wisdom but also the fear for responsibilities. No trust and full insecurity.

I really don’t know where is the satisfaction? It’s not the friends as it is known that you wouldn’t have the same person for everything at any demanding point of time. Love life is quite a dicey chapter and then comes the demands over the finances.

All these adventures and feeling of fire in heart- my friend, you are having your share of quarter life crises!

I rest my case here!

Sometimes this is the way of life.

It just stuck my mind amongst all these exams, sleepless nights, those language communications; I completed my 3 months of adventurous stay in this foreign land.

Did not know how time flew, 

yesterday was the only time of life that I knew.

Today felt like a kite flying with no worries,

 touching several clusters of my dreams

along the shades of sun in so different means.

Although, bounded by the surprise of the days,

like the freedom of the haze in maze,

 it is an innocent story 

of this dreamland glory 

to live life so flowery, 

which is blown in a flurry.

Touching every emotion

coupled with caution

Loneliness is what I feel

In this drought heal

Nobody knows am I moving closer or apart?

But the remoteness remained

Like the distance between our eyes

Yet the wishes had never gained

that hotness of the dice.

Words on a thread !

Just trying to make sense of this petty madness tied together with the flagrant hope of bringing out some amount of cohesion and comprehension; probably we all call it life. Funky shite, I tell you...

Major achievement, if you ask me... And this one's all about why I love living through this madness. Why I love trying to make sense and failing time and again and yet hopefully going for another try.

I love life because it’s beautiful. It’s got that poignant beauty of thinks that won’t last for long, like snowflakes and mayflies... Things that melt away or disappear, like a whiff of fancy!

 I love life because we alone can live ours. How much ever people try to take it away from us, we can still hold it within our little hands and hold it out to the sun. Warm it up a bit. Or hide it in our mitts when it gets cold and wintry.

I love life, most of all, because every moment in it is unique. Every moment you live belong to yourself 'cause you gave birth to it. And it would certainly not have existed without you, or outside of you. Life and all its moments stay with you and within you. Probably it’s the only thing that very truly belongs to you.

I love life because I can still feel, touch, hear, taste, see and live all that is around me.

I love life because I can smile, laugh, cry, hide my tears, and whisper my fears. Best part is I am never tired of it.

I love life because it holds a promise. A promise you can work out by yourself. A promise for the things around you!

I love life 'cause it has a past, a present and a future.

I love life because I try time and again to make sense outta it and never succeed.

So every once in a while, lean back. Take in a breath of air. Breathe in... Breathe out... Lick your lips and taste the air... It’s a beautiful world, and every inch and every moment of it belongs to you...

The Semi-Charmed kind of Life we lead... It’s funny... It’s sad... It’s happy... It’s mad... and above all its always worth living and loving...For all who made it this way, I enjoy it and appreciate it!

Nothing is worth losing, it is the art of living with fine mingling of holding on and letting go!

Destination Deutschland !

August, 2012

That was the last week in India. I was kind of running around for visa, last minute shopping and loads of farewells. People are getting little emotional while few people are envying. Not to say that I was little discontent leaving the comfort zone yet I have a profound dream and clear ambition in life. I guess this is one big chance to prove my stance and my talent.Probably a pass for new life too.

After a heavy emotional farewell, I was finally aboard. It felt so rosy and so peaceful. Serene it was. I was just that utter magical silence. No love. No hard friendships. No hauntings and no spying. Just no relations. This time I could feel old me and purest form of me. Heart clearly instructing on the ambition and mind totally focused. 8 hours of journey also did not tire me. Probably at that time I haven’t had any idea what is ahead me in few hours.

Dutcheland : Land of beauty and city of my dreams, Could not think anything except jaw-dropping at the sky scrapers.  They looked promised too in hiring me in  few months. Well.. That was not a hell lot of a dream but I wish it is the nearest reality. 

Single girl...60 kgs luggage... new city and the language as the main barrier; took an elaborate 3 hours to find my house and settle.

Then the reality struck. Dreams lightly got shaded and needs are craving to be fulfilled. After a 5 days of not so easy struggle, finally found an Indian couple on one of the shuttling trains I take to university who readily help me with rest of things.

Day one in the university: 200+ students … average GMAT score 670... Students from 57 different nations on a single platform and realising how special we are to be admitted – just an awesome feeling. Coping up with the best has now become one of the KRA’s as my track record helped me waive off my masters Prep semester (A semester which has to be taken by people with GMAT below the average and also for students with non-business background). I guess my stars are really bright and I was one of those 3 students who won the scholarship for the semester.

After a series of episodes, I finally managed to settle great with all formalities in place. Excellent infrastructure and superb global exposure and most importantly a great place to be. 

Sessions began and I get to know few Indians are around the campus and I hurried to catch up with them and I get to know everyone lives in my student hostel only … And amazing part is they r the students of IIM –A, B, C . Few students from NUS and AIM . I could feel the pride running in my limbs saying that I share a classroom with the best Indian managers.

This is a place where you are valued special for what you are ; probably more than  the dad’s princess and the king’s queen. Over all… I am loving it… nice people, new life and new stories and new world.

“It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be.”

Probably one of the best places where you can see the sun set and fog fall on the river Rhine and a clear peace of no guilt living! I miss no one and I wish to have not many too. 

Await the next post.. Am on a roll to tour around the Europe :D

Heart-Heat-hot!

Your whole world lies within you. The outer world is the manifestation of what is going on inside. The Power lies within you. Don’t think what others do, act & say, always travel on your desired path with your beliefs, loving & kindness to everyone coming on your way. Be happy for small things which will someday turn into bigger one. Have Patience & say to yourself something good going to happen today

Years of life in that city also never made me this twitchy as it is making me now. Feels like a haunted spoof. Well… I believed this is a day even the “I” was conquered by the desire. Yes, the ego in me also got in terms with the desire. 1000 feelings of this little churning heart, twirling around the mind probably struck harder than the labor pain and soother than the morning breeze. Hanging between the both, it needed just a patient calm heart to strike the equilibrium. Then I closed my eyes and imagined that situation how it would be, seen the world it would be, visualized the desire I want it to be and seized those thoughts as belief and was set to get sunk in those positive waves.

Breaking those age old contemplations was not easy, cracking those mental precincts was not easy and crossing those boundaries of distance is not easy yet the minute faith in today is tomorrow’s treasure. Well…thinking of tomorrow is again a long process while living the moment of the day as the last moment of the life is what was clinching.

Then comes the wisdom of life with different kinds of games .If you don’t play any, you won’t be able to understand the game. Only if you play well, you can jump to the next level. Without facing the music, you wouldn’t learn the dance and without taking risks, life wouldn’t be same as it ought to be.

So with a big risk of life, with a heart full of desire and mind full of confidence and with an attitude of “Just live today”, I pack my bags to that city which gave my LOVE a shelter and my dream a chance to live. It is just another travel but a very memorable travel! Unexpected is the expected flavor of every journey J

PS:  Actually no. The post wasn’t about you. But hey, if the shoes fit in right, wear it:-P

Tonight I know I cannot sleep; words, just words, spur rather than relieve

I,

Live life for me, for myself

Like the bird with huge wings,

I,

Live life with mind close, eyes laugh

Sew hope, buy faith, claim heal.

I,

Live life of a dream, with an open heart

To be the beholder

I,

Live life of love,

Where every moment is

Like that subtle flowing of song in my mind.

I,

Live life of the magic

Where my faith of destiny makes my serendipity

I,

Also live a life of fear,

To lose the face in the world

But

I,

Live life of no exception till I met him,

In discovery of the secret forcing no fail in finding the shore of faith.

Now,

We live the life of fun,

Till the shout to choke and clutter to blot.

Live It Along The Path

I wish every day of life is a long jog in the morning breeze fluttering the flowing hair in excitement. 

I wish everyday of life is a long drive speeding till the eyes drop the tear of joy! 

But every day of life is an unusual search for an unknown truth. 

This journey  along the path gets so engrossing that one is no longer feverish about the trail or even the destination. 

Is it the anxiety about the future and regret over the past ceases the sense of gratitude and fullness about the present moment dawns?

I Live it along the Path 
Bound by myself, blinded by me,
I seek, I strive, to set my soul free.

Free to me is the burning agony to just ‘be’
unfolding the umpteen paths ahead of me.

A mystic angel along the path helps,
as I take hesitant infant steps.
Never wanting to trace my trail back,
I trust, endure and progress on track.

I pause at times, at times I swing in sway
I continue to keep distractions at bay.
I want to move on; I know I should do,
on this mysterious quest for truth and virtue.

I know not what instilled faith in me
What made me this vast world see
In a renewed light of amazed awe;
With gratitude to ‘be’, here and now.

Hello Madamji! Smile karna mana hai

I didn’t do anything outlandish but that guy completely froze in his tracks. He looked at me in skepticism. My eyes glittered and smile just could not stop reaching my lips. Yet again I covered it with the bag I was holding. I am sure he must have concluded I was a plump mutant with extra face muscles enabling me to exert a smile. I never knew smiling at your EX is a strict no-no.

It’s already been a year and half we spoke, you did harm and I did what I could do. Damage is for the both then why still burning with the grudge .I seriously don’t get that point. Well, I just smiled in shock, surprise and happiness all that I had with that person. Year and half is not less to forgive the little harm and cherish the good times. And very soon after that I realized that such rule doesn’t apply when EX- friends encounter each other and when you know both have the same destination. We don’t smile at each other. I never understood why we approach each other with warning. I think we firmly believe that who smile at you are sales persons or gay (/lesbian) or both.

Then I got into the bus to locate my reserved place and settled happily there. Under the flickering light, I really did not feel like reading .I looked from the wink of my eye to check him out. Nah...I really didn’t wanna make it obvious. So I picked up the sticky note pad and started writing.

Where ever you stay and after how long you come across your EX and this is what you need to do: 

1. Under no circumstances make an eye contact. 

2. Pretend he is transparent and look through him. In the unthinkable event that you actually made eye contact, give him the “are you trying to steal my virginity” look.
3. If the other person stretches his lips into an expression unbeknownst to you, look at him as if he were an alien with a foot-long nose hair.
If at all your EX is a woman, the situation is worse. She will reflexively respond with a frown. It is somehow worked into the belief system that if she doesn’t frown back, it would be taken as an invitation to hit on them back.

One day, two of my friends who dated came to visit me at the same time. I was supposedly not in the room as I went to fetch some water for both of them. The gal walked straight to the water cooler. He said, “It’s unusually warm, isn’t it?” Just to make a simple conversation. She perked up and looked at me with shock, as if the question had the connotation of a mating call in the culture she grew up in. A range of expressions ran in her face. Shock, bewilderment, fear, oh-my-god-he-is-going-to-rape-me fear, disgust and frown. She gurgled yes and scrammed from there.

Well, the whole funda of writing this is IAM BORED sitting in this bus and adding kilos to my bum and cherishing all the events happened over this bus ride in last few months and also remembering my first EX-FRIEND who introduced MAHARAJA CHAAT BHANDAR to me, the one who showed me real Hyderabad from GACHIBOWLI to OLD CITY. I miss u for all those good times.

Hey Baby , I am Rosy for u *chuckles*

It has been quite a busy month for me .Being a wedding season, inevitably I attended quite a lot of weddings of my closest circle.Although I avoided staying there for long yet that 5 minutes was enough for them to rant and rave me for being in the age slab of 21-26.Before that let me congratulate all the brides and grooms.And am all happy for your freedom.You people were happy getting hitched and we poor souls got battered by words of the oldies.I know , you guys were also in our shoes in near past ...

 Let me tell you all who are in a presumption that 21-26 is rosy. Although we expected to have the best of our lives after teens, I tell you, it’s still the same; then and now. Typically it’s not the rosy life but the thorn below the rose is our life. Your ex-s are getting married, your career has just started, elders treat you as unproven theorems, and people think you’re always wrong even when you’re right. You're too old for college but too young for work. You seem to enjoy both cartoon and news which is again a crime of whiling time. You can no longer eat whatever you wish without being conscious or putting on weight. Every Aunty you meet asks “Shaadi Kab kar reheho” while uncles ask “Career plans kya hai beta? Job mila or kali abi bi.” When the reality is that you are just riding the wave and going with the flow, you have all the confidence in the world but little achievements to show. You already have the first hand experience of life, you know that whatever you have been taught about the world in schools has been sheer waste of time. You can be denied a job even after passing the test and you could be given a job even if you know someone placed high enough. Politics till now was a dirty word but now you feel it everywhere. You know now love is not that blind and that friendship sometimes has its terms and conditions. Your true friends are like your family. Whether they are old or new, they will always be there for you, now and for life. You're learning that there is nothing for granted. Your over confidence is now making way for a humble conscience. And you now realize that this age and part of life is not exactly what we thought it would be. Despite all these, your life mocks at your irony and says, “Yes baby, I am rosy for you “.

Courtesy : For people who still believe LOVE MARRIAGE is a crime ...

For people who still believe career and love cannot go hand in hand...

For people who believe getting a job is the highest achievement ...

“Do not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.”

"If it still hurts, you still care."

Today morning when I was on face book to catch up for the updates, I stumbled upon a post of my close friend. In fact he was one of the best of friends I had. I rubbed my eyes to check if it was true. Checked, doubled checked and again checked. In fact I stopped there gaping at it – ENGAGED.

Now what is that hurting me? That should be happy news, isn’t it?

Since a year and half , we eventually we turned out to be best of friends where I had the most dreadful incident of my life. Our friendship turned fonder and fonder with the times. We’re so crazy, that people think we're high. It’s the times we laughed so hard, we can't help but cry. It’s all the inside jokes and "remember when’s". He had never been the emotional crutch yet again we knew what is good for us to be the best of friends.

And today, I get to know he was engaged through a social media site. Yes I agree, I might have given him hints of me being single then and he has tried his luck. If it did not happen, it did not happen. But that doesn’t cost all the good times we had together. How silly!

When I go upfront to ask about it, this is what I get to hear-”Yaar, glad you knew it. You see it’s all the emotions, hope you understand. And thanks for the wishes if at all you are wishing good for me.”

It should be easy, right?
 That person is no longer in your life--so shut them out and move on.

But it never is.
Memories of happy times come back to dance on the edges of reason to mock and jeer you.
And it hurts. More like hell.
Like pin pricks of a million needles.
Like hell like the jagged edges of a broken glass.

But it is long gone now, and the friendship lives only in your memories. Now I smile bravely and pretend it does not matter anymore. But deep down I remember it all for I have given. I really donno how to react but it feels like a deliberate million insult for the poor kind who respected the friendship. Adding to it is , blocking me on face book and blocking my calls.

Ok now to deny the fact would be like lying to yourself just as mourning for something that cannot be and wallowing it.
Life is full of surprises. And time is ticking.
You may be amazed at what it gives back.

So I go out there, give my best smile, Grab it, LIVE it, revel in it.
But all I can say is “Start by asking yourself whether each of your relationships drags you down or lifts you up...
Surrounding yourself with positive, loving people is half the battle of living a happy, successful life”!

My company made me Zombie

Yesterday in office, I was having some interesting and chirpy conversation with couple of guys. Yes, we were loud enough that almost everyone in the floor joined us. The crowd got a majority of male employees. Somehow this has been noticed by the HR and interpreted in their style. Ideally, these HR’s are designed that way only where even the guy and girl being in the same room comes as harassment! We, of course were talking … and here comes the adversity. Tomorrow ..undoubtedly they would surely impose some kindergarten rules.

As we noticed her, slowly the crowd got diluted and got back to the regular boring stuff as every day.
As we were getting adjusted there, we were interrupted by an unexpected email from our HR. The email said, in essence, “You must complete a "MANDATORY SEXUAL HARASSMENT TRAINING.” I felt insulted. I mean, I know how to sexually harass people. I don’t need training. In fact I can try helping you with various tips in harassment.

The online presentation started out promisingly. It showed several scenarios where people were performing sexual harassment. Although, I would say their approach to harassment was tad amateurish. I mean, to harass a female colleague, one doesn’t walk up to her and put a hand around her shoulder. It would be done more skillfully. I thought of contacting the HR and offering my skills and experience to prepare a more educational and “hands-on” presentation.

After 10 minutes into the presentation, it suddenly turned tables and started preaching that harassment is wrong. LOL ….That was when I realized the training was about how not to harass.
“What is wrong with HR? They want to take every bit of fun out of work! “
That was the first reaction from N who was next to me.
I could see where it was going. Funnily, we were well prepared to hear that “The complete critical figures chart of All Female Employees”. Mind you... the figures here are just the NUMBERS….

It turns out anything you do, say or even think at work is inappropriate. In short it is considered as luring at the opposite sex. And the presentation goes on and on, mostly because they have to find ways to include all racial types in the “sample scenarios.”

What was more insulting were the “breaks”. After every 3 minutes, they had this completely retarded quiz with the answer so obvious that you have to be some blond bimbo to miss it. (Apparently saying “blond bimbo” is inappropriate too!) The questions looked as silly as this:

Q: When you meet a female coworker, what is an appropriate way to greet her?

A) Hug her firmly and gently caress her posterior
B) Drop on all fours and lick her feet
C) Look into her eyes and say “Good morning”
D) Jump on her and dry hump her

Really? This is an insult to quizzes worldwide.

And this is for the girls there…

Q. Where are you supposed to look when you meet a male coworker?

Luckily no options were given for this ..: P

And the presentation goes on to tell you that the company wants you to be one of those nerdy, stuck up a-holes who reports everything they see to management. In fact, not reporting a potential issue is a violation of company’s policy. I am going to send reports to HR from tomorrow. “I saw a male person holding his unclothed genitals (hidden from view) for about 30 seconds in a public place.” Also known as peeing in the restroom. And now don’t ask me what I am doing in a gent’s rest room: P It happens when we bump in there clueless sometimes, cuz of no boards ….

In any case, by the end of the presentation, I was fatally scared to even talk to male coworkers. It is worse with female coworkers, who I can’t even look at. You see, the laws for same-sex advances are much stricter. And how the hell am I suppose to know what is interpreted as making an advance in the homosexual world! The only ways to stay away from sexual harassment is to blindfold and gag myself and wear a straitjacket and hope that it does not remind anybody of some kinky BDSM fantasy.

Life is all what you make it

She lay awake in her tiny bed, underneath the pallid covers, her neck sore from sleeping on one pillow. Her sleep medicine has worn off and she is now once again a prisoner to her insomnia. Ironically it never showed up in the mere silence she always put up. In fact any of the expression never showed up at least in the last 6 years. That is vaguely the figure I got to know about her from the warden who was associated with her. She was never moved by anything, neither elated by any damn PJ too. Neither got disturbed by her roommate snore. She looked as if she was trapped in a house that was filling with water, drowning and gasping for air and making a mental note to live that moment.

 I was more inquisitive about her only although many suggested not to waste time on her. I went up to her with a sweet box and said, “Lady, I got a seat in top management school “. Immediately I could see her actually react, that is supposed to be the first reaction of the decade. She smiled and said …” Radha … Go, live it all! Be careful of this big bad world “.And best part was the doc was surprised to hear her speak and that too in Kannada. Then suddenly a tear dropped down within no time it turned into long sob. And strangely this even didn’t come up in her regular psychotherapies.I meant any of these emotions. I wanted to know more. I managed to spend time with her alone, thanks to my psychology degree :-) . That served me some or other time.

Then, I began to look at examine her meticulously, yet not showing up that I am doing something as profession. I asked her, “Radha is your daughter, no”. She hasn’t replied as ever. “If at all I am Radha, what would you say? At least be the mom you are to tell me all. Don’t worry I am no way related to the examiners who visit you .I am just here to celebrate my happiness “.

Then she began to speak.” U stay all alone in this city? No harm to you? A world ready to exploit the women, u should be married or stay in your parents’ shelter”.

I allowed her to speak.

She spoke as if I hypnotized to know her past. “I am a lady who hail from a small village in Karnataka where I had bare minimum education .I was married as a trade between two parties of two villages. Before I realized that I am married, I moved out into another party which turned me to be a prostitute. I worked till my ovaries were removed. By then I had a gal child at age of 22. All I knew by then is she should be not me and she should be educated”. Then she stopped as her voice choked in the dreadful past. I could actually see the adversity she faced on her face while narrating.

She continued, “I moved to the next village to make the living for both of us. I joined Radha in school. I started working in a hospital as a sweeper. Once my ill health showed up while working which diagnosed to be AIDS. Then doc suggested Radha also to have a check up on it. Finally my dark secret of being a prostitute was out. Radha couldn’t take this disgrace. She left me to work her living than studying with my money. Unfortunately she faced this bad world in the doc who diagnosed me. She was eventually killed so brutally.I swept her body too. Well, this is also used as a documentary movie for awareness and I was paid for it … Had she been studying … now she would be like u in some management course”.

Looking at her then keenly, I found her so beautiful for the way she snubbed her past and filled her void darkness in this silence. But I could not stop asking her what she was doing here and why is so resistant to the treatment? Then I realized Mental hospitals are very misunderstood places. There is a certain stigma not only attached to being a patient in a mental hospital, but to the whole field of mental health to begin with. The people I met were not nuts. They just needed a little extra help and a safe, relaxing place to recuperate from their problems

She spoke again “I went in suicidal, depressed, and a terrified mess, and two months later, I came out, in the process of being healed, with people, and a new perspective on life. My hospitalization not only saved my life, it changed it”. Yet again I didn’t speak cuz I fear the trap of emotions than the feeling of emptiness. I dread the confidence in the world, yet again I learnt that I had a life that to start fresh and be thankful to the lord for being alive to avail the chance”.
I wondered how she could actually snub all the emotions blanketing it with the peaceful silence.

Quickly she grabbed her bag to pull out an Rs10 note to lend it to me to pay my fees with it saying that she is giving it to her daughter.This is the last saving she made to pay Radha's school fee. She even confirmed that it was earned by gardening. I was really touched. Asked her to promise that she would react to the medication and yet show up the zeal then only I would take her gift.

Probably I could not comprehend her emotions properly but I could just say that -Life is the greatest gift. Feel that beauty of creation in and around u .laugh a day, make someone’s day happier and appreciate that everything which is good to you. Respect everything and stop not in expressing ourselves. Life comes with no boundaries and limitations. Live it to the fullest. Be thankful to be alive and enjoy in all. If at all it did inspire any of you, my task is fulfilled.This is all I learnt how to live in disgrace too .

Courtesy: Kasturba Nature Care Hospital , Hyderabad.

Disclaimer: It is purely an non fictional work , a real experience.

Things change huh ... it goes in a circle ...

It’s already a year past? Oh my freaking mad… I just did not realize the way it went in this chaos. For mushy person like me it took me a year to be anti-mush. “I want to get rid of nostalgia, me and my freakishly good memory for the mundane. Non sentimentality is my goal and needless to say, I’m not prosaic anymore”. That’s all the mind started screaming loud as a loud beep interrupted it by a text message at 11.55 PM. “Happy Birthdayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Yay! “My eyes almost popped out as it was unexpected. Although I replied “tq” But my mind cribbed..Kanjoos –Maakichoos…. Phone kar sakta hai Na…Saala ...”I love u “bolne ke liye 1000 times’ kareya ...Ek no suna...bas...katam... Wtf … Why don’t people get to normal!

12 -3 PM calls were lined up to wish me. Probably that is the only day I was made princess of this paradise in this strange world. Everyone showers the utterly love on you. Also it is the only chance to live the fullest of bitterness in the name of birthday “bombs-bums”. Ouch …u don’t ask me about it… 2 days passed and I still can’t still properly on my own bum. I was bashed to brim of everyone’s grudge .Irony is that comes with a smile and should be taken with smile only.

Oh good… K didn’t call me at 12 ….his call would be on priority for me than anyone’s. Again that would be a cribbing point. Loads of flowers …lots of noise….I always enjoyed it being the birthday person …say it mine or someone else’s .Face book , mobile , mails ..All flooded with wishes...Love and nostalgic photographs… but I waited my whole day for only phone call. Just a call... only that heart knows how much I waited for it and of course K knew it too. Finally I got it as the way it comes every year!

Of course it concerns me when an aged old friend of mine don’t wish me …it hurts when my boy friend is not next to me... it frets when people walk away from my life impertinently. But K only consoles me saying …don’t expect...just respect and go with the flow. Had he not been correct, I would not have enjoyed his 12 ‘0 clock surprise … or a mail that made me smile from a parted friend of mine ...” No one can be mad at oneself and others forever… Happy Birthday “

But still small things did hassle me …like the girl next to me...who is suppose to be good of friends at work place actually did not wish me. Also the friend who is the first one to call every year on my birthday wished me on Face book. Well, it is petty if you don’t expect...but can someone stop expecting???

I really don’t have to be that dejected too as I already have more that is troubling…where the most caring friend of mine who never leaves an opportunity to make me special ,left me back as his expectation is something more from this relation. Another one comes up with a proposal when I not ready for any commitment. Another one breaks up cuz her crush loves me. The best was the guy who pushed me to wall to like him and backs off when things are falling in trail. A hard lesson that I have learnt yet again…I always knew...But ignored to adapt … Expectation – The Virus of Unhappiness!

Had I not expected what you have given then I wouldn't have been nostalgic to the point of swooning, romantic to the point of being slapped by people and verbose to the extent of getting a parched throat. Yes, I expected and now being the memory that would put even a goldfish to shame. And now things changed and as for me… I am... sand in the wind- Sandieeeee, a new life unfolds - this is for all of you, a part of my world, then and now, thank you for the wishes.

Ok in short .. my Birthday went off in the dilemma of expectation and re-framing me ... 

He speaks....

I've been away a while. And I've faced a blitz of complaints. People groan about why I haven't been blogging. They beg me to write. They express their sorrow at the lack of Google Reader updates. Very soon, I foresee a crowd gathering underneath my window with placards and candles, in an attempt to appeal to my sensitive side, just so I write something. I'm here only because I want to save the paper that would have gone into making those placards.

Alright so two people asked me why I haven't been blogging when I have all this free time.

I have been busy consoling one of my friends who had a pretty bitter break up; bitter as bitter as she wanted all the rainbow colors on her boy friend…. Yeh tho hona hi tha..

Since I had been the cupid of their story, I had to be their God father too.. For that I had to skip my lovely shopping too.I guess my friends would be happy about it...

Me: Problem kya hai ?

He speaks:

Problem yeh hai ki woh ladki hai.
aur kya problem hai
Problem is that I expect not to have any problem in my life
But I not having any problem is the biggest problem of her life..

Her Birthday
Her dog’s birthday
Her 1st kiss day... Her 1st school day... her 1st farewell day..
Damn...Almost every day...
Take for example the Batman story only..
Until I become a bat man she is like you do nothing for me...huh...janu...u don love me at all
nakara ho
napunshak ho
When I actually become batman..
She chuckles and says...U became a bat man...I want a normal human being..
How would I be able to live with u?
Then comes the Shopping ka bhoot…
Her shopping is never ending
First take cushion
Then curtain
Cushion, Curtain don't match
Again a cushion!
Trust me...I have so many mugs at home...
I went to set them off…I actually got back my 2 months’ salary...

Every 2 weeks dimag gorge
table lena hai
table lena hai
5 ghante maal bitane par ek sadhi si chappal utha kar layenge
aur fir agale do hafte dimag chatenge
table lena hai
table lena hai...
Ufff…I really have to kill myself for having a mobile..
i love u kahe bina mobile kaata
toh naatak...
If I be a listener..
Am I not interesting to u ? bolke she cries
 Seriously
mein shart laga sakta hoon...

kya soch rahe ho???
 kya soch rahe ho???
Puch puch ke .. She actually irritates me
If at all the girl next to me asks me anything..Done my day...
What, why, how, when...all the questions throw up.
camera laga doon dimag mein...
 Bas use argument starts .. never ends..infact I swear ..old city ladies fighting near the water tap can also never win upon her.

If this is it…The shopping part..the ultimate one…
There was one jhinchaak orange and blue color tie she picked up which is very nice and raucous. But I might have cabin fever for that combo. And she says…
Hey Hun! Try this on. This looks perfect on u !
If at all ..I be lil frank is saying Ah..It looks as if I just puked up a rainbow
Then also she don get it….
Perfect! Now you can even fart Rainbows standing front of me..:P

Damn..haadh hai yaar…
If at all I say the night is dark, she starts making my life colorful as much as a RIN soap ad .. . It's as though I am in a Rin safedi ad and I'm the moron who doesn't use Rin soap.
Love life lacklustre, dorling? Have no fear, I shall be your Rin soap. 

Kuch karo naaaa... bagguuuu...

Well..that was the first time I saw a guy crying.. And this is just an episode 1 1st part .. more to come up...

Frustration is end of all Experiences .

Story of a life ...

One random winter weekend nothing to do, probably the entire enthusiasm for living has got for a toss. Not because I had a bitter break up or I was home alone or I was aloof by everyone, probably Vice versa. I found a crumb lying beneath the beam bag on which I was sitting, getting crushed as much as my heart. Before I picked it up, one last message I wanted to type and end it of …

“If you ever liked the relation, you would have known how much it pains. Whatever, you are splendor of the loser, my ditcher! “

Then to the contrary, I found the rag having a man’s pic overly smiling like in a tooth paste ad. But the message was strong…

“Life is too short for discoveries of your own unless you come out to explore the exposed exclusivity “

I haven’t actually decided to attend that Stammtisch like thing of the veterans but the teaser and tedium played their part of spur. Finally I got off my dark den and set a long walk towards the beautiful park where the veterans already started off  with their cartoon exhibition. Probably they were talking about the way young take the life so insanely.

There was awe spread across them seeing me there. Done with initial part of my intro, I was just killing my time but eventually my attention was dragged by an old man, probably 85+ years. 

Every minute has been a gift, so it’s the present from the lord. How do you take the right to complain the beauty of creation where you are a mere scrounger? I haven’t asked for that Oxford education, I have not asked for the beautiful wife and healthy child.

I couldn’t resist being nasty. "You have got everything what a perfect life has. Any reason to complain? Then philosophy never existed in your life".

 He looked deep intense into my eyes. Donno why, but my body had a virtual current shock internally. I shivered as the water rushed beneath the blood.

 He then narrated, “My wife is paralyzed when my son had passed away in the 9/11”. Neither I am too good to serve my beautiful lady with my two arms too”. Then he stood up on his clutches. All I could see a portion of pantaloons hanging each side where the legs are to be freely flown. All he has nothing but a broken-down shed and a rickety sack that is “patched with flour sacks” and looks “like the flag of permanent defeat.” The skin of his gaunt body illustrates his hardships and is marked with deeply-set wrinkles, scars, and blotches from the punishing sun. And because of his terrible misfortune, he is a pariah in his cartoon paints. But paradoxically that all reflected was quite a contrast of his life. They were happy, glee and so enticing. Everything was so much about the art of living, probably that is what his personality is.

But something that pricked me was, when you Donna the surprise of next moment in your life. .how are you sure of a decision for life time? He was good in explaining this too…

Life is too short for discretion. Today is what you get.... Live it the fullest as it comes...

Then I asked him rest is on destiny?

Nope... It is how strong your will power is to live with it.

Then why it pains when it is broken?

Coz you are making your own choice of it. The irony is, you don’t have the choice of things coming your way yet you wish have with is again a toss. The desire, the expectation is your best rival.

Certainly these made an effect on my living. He was not seen again but his inspiration was my motivation not because he had an Oxford degree but for the way he lived without two legs yet supporting the world on his crutches. The only thing he had was a crutch of smile through his cartoons.

“In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness. Our life is a long and arduous quest after Truth. ”

The untold to unfold ....

"And hence, every butter has its bitter for the better".

There was a flood of applause across the hall. No wonder people missed to catch the ‘bitter’ and ‘better’. In such an earsplitting throng also I managed to hear “kabhi aati nahi phir bhi creative employee award mil jati hai ... Kya makhan mari karti hain ye ladkiyaan ...”

I seriously could not get the point there. Is it the ego as he was sharing the award with her or the looked down attitude on her?

Back to her 'bitter' and 'better'. A week before this conference I saw her strangling around something over the phone probably with her spouse.

Some things come upon us gently, and sometimes with a giant boom-crash-and-bang.
Either way, after the initial chaos, I believe change always leads  to a better and happier place. And it is to embrace and welcome, to smile and feel good about.
Although I never wanted to stalk but eventually I ended up doing that by sipping a coffee and picking up a magazine pretending to ignore her presence in the cafeteria.

“What point is there when life becomes a compulsory treadmill? You have to get off and get a breath of fresh air, take a walk in the park”.

But unlike the others, I did notice tears streaming down her face and I am reminded that information is a powerful thing.

Later I have learnt that her constraints want her to be a good, ideal home maker and not leading the Asia’s business. But again, is it the compromise or the authority?

The following weekend, I had my friend at my doorstep in a very unusual hour of the night.
Before I could inquire, the heavy sniveling stopped to speak...

“I feel my pulse aloud in my ear. But trust me; I am just pushed to the wall.
I couldn’t do anything. I lost my job... I lost my career...I lost the aspiration…”

I interrupted to say … Have you lost the freedom of expression?

But again... I had to agree on this for a normal employee VS the continent’s head.

“Some things never really leave you. They stalk you now as they have stalked you before. The past haunts you; the present kills you with the realization that tomorrow will be the same or even worse!! There is no escape route, nothing to hold on to, no dream, no light at the end of the tunnel, not even family to keep you sane”.
What do we call this as …Gender exploitation?

Other day, I have spotted this in the news of a village where every woman was laid down on the roads and the so –called Babaji walked over them. This is to be considered as a tribute for the well being of the family of those women, who bore his leg. Ridiculous but true, this is followed on the great consent of the men of every family which has a lady. Are they left with choice?

Well this isn’t about women empowerment but this a clean pun for the one who says the new era is the women’s era. Educated or uneducated, power or professional, women have always spun in the spring. Even today, people don’t talk about Chinmayi Sripada as youth icon but acknowledges Ranvijay.

I am sure no guy would say his all time role model is his mother.
I am sure no one knows what is the first dream of the woman at their home had.
I am sure no one knows why they have that uninvited attitude when talking to a lady.
I am sure no one knows why the lady’s untold is always unheard.
Is it just because she is a women?

Hum kisise kam nahi ..

First thing Hyderabadis are known for is their DUM-KA-BIRYANI but forget not their masha Allah Hindi...
They are more amusing than any... Trust me, not even the zoo …

Here go few of them :-)

An archetypal daily practiced conduct:

• He goes to gas station to fill and says "Paanch point single oil daalo". 
• He says "Abbi aatau miyaa" and vanishes for couple of hours or does not come back at all. 
• He sleeps around 1 am and wakes only after 9:30 am. 
• He drinks half cup of tea at least 6 times and buys only 1 gold flake cigarette. 

And mention not their eating habits:

• If they do not eat rice at least once a day they will die. 
• For them the only good dishes on earth are Hyderabadi biryani, Nahari, Haleem, Khatti daal, Tamataun ka saalan, Bhendi ka sherwa, Dhai ki kadi, Paalak ki bhaaji, Aaloo baigan, Gawaar ki phalli, Kheema aloo methi. Khaagina, Khichdi,Boti ka saalan, Khadi daal, Bagaara khaana daalcha,Mirchiyaa bhajiye,Khubaani ka mittha, Kaddu ki kheer and Fruit salad . 

Once in a week he will visit Alhamdulillah, Bismillah to eat Kalyaani biryani.

Best places for hangouts are irani café (any branch) . Mention not their hygiene. They have more relatives than the piercing houseflies around to squeeze each other.

New Generation (Males):

• 2 out of 3 are Sharukh, Amir or Salman Khan.He feels offended if someone looks at him "Kaiku ghoorra miya??" 
• They only want to become Engineer, Doctor or MBA. 
• For most of them US visa is a dream and Saudi visa a blessing. 
• Most of the boys spend their precious time at "gali ke nukkad pe", "chabootre pe", "hotelon mein", girls college, playing billiards, chatting on internet, teasing girls, changing mobile phones and spend their parents hard earned money. 
• "Her ladke ki Amrika ki koshish chalte rehti aur side mein Landan ki bhi ya phir Bhaunai Saudi se visa bhejne waale rehte". 

New Generation (Females):

• If she is not studying at "St Ann’s or Vijay Marie" then she is not studying at all, Shadaan College is a compromise. 
• Stanley is the only school and college for girls from Old city. 
• Begums is the most preferred beauty parlor. 
• Most of them would not like to wear sharaara for the second time, “Her shaadi mein nayaa sharaara chaahiye". 
• Most of them say" Main kapde sirf Neerus OR Meena bazaar se hi leti hun". 
• Par actually shopping means only "chudi " @ old city . 

Par kambakth … kabhi kapde hi nahi dekte.. 

Finding a Match (Ladke waale):

All most all the cases are dealt by Marriage Bureau.
A team of a dozen goes to see the girl (to eat pastries, bananas, fruit biscuits)
When they return home after seeing the girl, someone from the family says"badi se manjli ke aankh naak ache hai nai".
Her kisi ko gori ladki chahiye,if they want to reject they say" Ladki ka khad aur rang kam hai,hamare bachhe ki height achi hai"(5'6").
They say "Ladke ku family visa bhi hai",even if he makes 3000 riyals and "Ladke ka kafeel bhaut acha hai,tanqaa badaataun bola shaadi ke baad"."Inter fail ladke ku bhi Graduate ladki honaa".

Finding a Match (Ladki waale):

Almost all ads say"Ladki soum aur salaah ki paaband hai" and "Shaadi mein jaldi hai, ladki ke bhai baaher se aaye hue hai".
Advertisements sometimes clearly mention"Ladke ku kaarobaar bhi lagaa ke denge" or "Azad visa bhi denge" or "Ladki ke naam pe jaaydaad hai" (500 gaz ka plot,makaan ya phir flat).
Hyderabadi parents only look for US/Canadian Immigrants or Gulf settled - Deen ki nisbat pe rishte karne waale aaj kal bahut kam honge.

Finally Shaadi ke Din....... 
If there is no dinner a lot of them are disappointed, they say "Kya jaate miya gaadi ka kiraya daal ke,kheench nai hai".

Many still take “Jode ki rakham" and if you ask Dulhe raja he will say "Mereku nai maloom,Ammi Abba baat karliye,main toh nakko bola sheikh".

These days nikaah takes place at masjid but the jahez(dowry) reaches grooms home late night when neighbors are in deep in sleep.

Invitations clearly mention that nikaah is at 7pm but Dulhe raja arrives at 8:30 pm,9 pm,9:30 pm and soon after nikaah people are desperately waiting for someone to announce "Aaiiye" (call for dinner).

They are crazy about chicken"Poori dish undal lete mauka mile to".

Pehle Haleem khaate fir chicken fir biryani fir chicken aur fir chicken fir qubani ka mittha fir kaddu ki kheer aur fir aakhri mein he puts some dahi ki chatni on his palm and starts licking it.

When he is done with food he needs a cigarette and then the discussion on the quality of food starts.

Hyderabadis in Gulf:

Ek doosre ki taang kheechte rehte wahan per.

Nayaa nayaa jo bhi aata usko bolte"Kaiku aaye miya,kya hai yaan pe,sab khatam hogaya,sirf khurchan baaqi hai (Lower level of cooked rice),

waipe kuch bhi kerlena tha".

PS: Mind you, I’m neither a critic nor trying to discriminate; I not only love Hyderabad but also the Hyderabadis.

When Sun went down on me ....

Before I could actually wake up, I was forced to wake up. Ask why? I was drenched in a pool of water that was stinking which can be statured to be Urine. At once, I feared it was mine. Nah...God showed mercy; it’s not mine... *satisfactory grin*. It’s my baby niece. Before I am well delighted, bacha kahan hain?

After a melodrama, we finally found her in my bean bag in my balcony sunk in my tee.

I freshened up to go for my gym class. Haan ji...Sunday ko bhi... Our weirdo gym gives us a holiday on Monday.

People call me living disaster. Wondered why, until my most obsessed gym owner  threw me out.

Walking or running on any moving surface, such as a treadmill, increases your chances for a crash and burn. Dynamic in iPods, water bottles and towels and you add more tasks and objects that interfere with your ability to walk straight.

Thoooooddd! Patttt ..putttt..

Don’t wonder about the 3 sounds. One -I fell, Two-I tore the next guy’s shirt while I was falling off, and  three -the hit the falling bottle in the trainer’s wrong place:-P

Before something more can happen, I decided to join the deadly quiet yoga class. You’re breathing; you’re downward dogging and - whoops - now someone farts. Even worse, it’s loud enough to rip the fabric of the space-time continuum. And swear...it wasn’t me. I will have my daily dose. I am fed with triphala churan:-P. But every one’s eyes were on me. Uff… how embarrassing I tell u…

Rushed back home to reframe the disaster. But that is my birth right u c... I hit an auto guy on my way back...Who doesn’t hesitate to use words like"baigan ke","Hau", "Nakko","Hallu" ,

"Bole to suno miyaa","Kaiku" and "Kate".

An other depressing episode …Some other time.

Then I actually was awaiting another disaster. I missed wishing my friend on his birthday @ 12. No wonder I had to take it all on my way back. For that I had to give the Hyderabad road attendant (Suppose to be the official vagabond) a donation of 2K as holiday bonus. Ha... unko general terms mein traffic police bolte hain.

If this was it, the ultimate travesty is yet to happen.

 I am out for lunch with my friends and my mom calls me up while she was shopping out. My bloody phone exceptionally in its ICU condition, works only on speaker. There my mom screams at top of her vocal box, beta... Tera size kya hain?  …

After all, even my fate needs to make fun at least after this much of clowning. I sooner or later landed up in a sangeet party where a drunkard on his dannu comes ear-piercing probably at me, “basanti in kutton ke samne mat nachna”. People around tumbled and toppled for that. I was neither dressed up like basanti nor was bopping around. But whatever it was... Bhagwan , Life se Panga ho gaya :-P

Blog is mightier than anything

Highlights:

Me:Characters exchange?
V:Sure? Phir se sochlo…
Me:Yeah baby! Muah… of course... Sure hone ki kya baat ha…
V:Arey waah …Yeh bhi tere blog ke liye?

Scene one:

Me: Acha jaanu … thu mere liye kuch bhi karega hai na…
How much u know me? U love na..?? (Gloomy face)
Aaj kal mein itna kuch karri huin ..thu kuch bhi nahi bolta…

My boyfriend (V): Of course I love you and see we are tying knot soon also …
Anything for u baby<3!

Me: Go home and text me …
Then will ask you :-|

Acha pehle ye bata.. why do u end a conversation only in one word or two? 

How do I look to you ?Devil?

(After our puppy love, we departed our ways in half an hour.
 There was a loud beep on my mobile)

(V):  Wazzup babe?
Me: Hey jaaanu ...<3<3<3!! Just waiting for your message..Itna dher kyu kar diya ?
Kisse baat karra tha?  Woo Sapna se?? Yeh Seema se??
(V): hehe .love u baby …
Acha bol kya puchna hain?
Me: U anyways don’t answer na..no point asking..:-( :-(:-(
(V): Baby .Pooch na… Characters exchange karna hain?
Me: Pakka?? Sochlo :P
(V): Jo aapki hukum…
Me: Ok ..now u as me and I as u …
So guess what I wanted to ask u …(over intelligent Smirk)
(V):Ok..being u is simple honey…here it goes as a sample.
Acha online aaja .. Can't type. 

Me: Nah.. I am cool here.. I have an Iphone.

(V):Write a snarky-free essay on two of the following (3000+ words):
My dad (your would-be father-in-law)
Your emotions right now
Describe the appearance of your ideal woman, starting with her shoes. Actually, just the shoes—the rest, U know.
Critique the outfits I wore on our last 7 dates (skip the 3rd and 5th most recent dates; add more detail about the 6th.)
List (all questions compulsory):
10 colors that are not in the rainbow, or in a box of crayons.
10 things you can do that my mom will find cute.
All our anniversaries and important days.
All festivals when you are not permitted to discuss religion, or give any variant of your “how 99% of the world’s religions are already extinct” speech.
10 friends—besides members of your “band”—that you think you will need to phase out of your life, once we’re married. (Do not include friends that have already been phased out.)
Write the last joke of mine you ever laughed your heart off.
Describe in brief all your ex-girlfriends. Attach their pictures. All the pictures. And gifts, etc. Basically everything that’s in “the box.” Just attach the whole box.
Under what circumstances are you permitted to lie to me?

(V): I INSIST YOU TO WRITE IT DOWN AND SEND IT ACROSS IN NEXT HALF AN HOUR. WARNA….
Me: Ok!
(V): No googling ah !
Your time starts now.. Am waiting ! Jya wait karwana mat baby <3! Muah !

Me:OK

Scene two:
ME typically living V’s character which means , just to stay silent and not showing up any emotions except say “Muah! “ “Love u jaanu “periodically. But my birth instinct never dies..After a long brain storm as how my life will turn with such a person, best thing I could come up with is to start a blog named , “mybfisnotme.blogspot.com” 

TITLE: NEVER MARRY A BLOGGER:

Here are the best reasons …

1. You’ll know she is pregnant through her blog.

2. Whether you fart, scratch, snore, or forget the anniversary, it is all up there.

3. Before you get to know, the whole world will get to know that she is having trouble with her mother in law.And also there would always be a weird comparison about her DADDY cool and you.

4. She will rant about how certain other blogs get more number of comments than she does though they write crap, and you are supposed to be sympathetic.

5. Should the template be Minima stretch or Minima lefty stretch? Template number 587 or 498? Tic Tac blue or stretch denim template? Certainly your decision making skills could be put to better use.

6. She claims that blogging is the only way of venting frustrations and letting out the steam whenever she is upset with someone. Including you.

7. You don’t want to live fearing the rest of your life that every morning you wake up, you’ll read a post starting “My husband is a…….”, with a hundred comments starting “Oh how could he?”, “He should…..” and “He should not……”.

8. You wake up from a nightmare that your wife has just made your darkest secret public, till you realize it wasn’t a nightmare. It was reality.

9. Every little nice thing you do for her will be up there on the blog. Every little mean thing you do to her will also be there up on her blog.


10. You are accountable for every female who comments on your blog, but you are not supposed to ask her about the males who leave comments on her blogs, because that makes you a suspicious, overtly jealous and possessive pig.

11. You are supposed to treat her out every time a blog of hers gets featured on DesiPundit or Blogbharti.

12. You are not supposed to take sides during heated blog discussions aka feline blog fights. You don’t have an opinion. You are her husband. You are to take her side. Always.

13. You would rather stay at home playing PSPs on the weekend than accompany her as the faithful puppy to be showed off at the local monthly blog meets.

14. Sometimes, the only way you can understand what’s up on her mind and why is she acting weird is by reading her blog. To discover that she was just having her periods.

15. Again and again, you will be given kasams to not read certain blog posts of hers. The whole world can know about it while it has to be a secret from you. And if you don’t, you are not giving her space or respecting her privacy.

16. You are in the middle of a Barcelona vs. Real Madrid game at your best buddy’s place when you get an SOS call from a common philanthropist friend- “Run home. You just forgot your wife’s birthday and it’s all over there on her blog”

17. You are not supposed to get jealous when you read about how she met her college crush and had coffee with him when you read it in her blog.

18. The world wasn’t supposed to know that you sleep in your superman underwear.


I was sweating all around in 16 degrees temperature too. Suddenly I wake up to realize
Silence not only kills but trills ….

Pe(e)pal Cannot Stay Single!

The other day, someone I know emailed me telling that my blogs are being stress busters for people at their work place. “Glad u like them :-)”

And other mentioned in his email, only things that is keeping them happy despite their stagnant business is my blog. I was curious to know what's around. There goes his narration of a black cat residing in his new work place and this and that. I was just so amazed for the fact how that deprived tiny cat can impinge on someone’s bread and butter. Wondering if it was seriously a crisis. He consulted some babaji who suggests him to re-unite the banyan tree and peepal tree. “Damn... re-unite...mane...wedding... Seriously???”

Omg... Just imagine... are they gonna perform all the post shaadi rituals too?? If yes...How???I am still not getting...how?

Who would be the bride and the groom? And how would they be dressed...

To figure it out, I went there for the so –called nuptials...

“Raat ke dhai baje koi shehnai baje,

Dil ka bazaar laga, dhilak ta pai baje”
Midst rhythmic beating of drums and singing, a group of people married two trees in a specially organized ceremony on Sunday. The banyan tree's branches got entwined with that of a peepal tree, making people read a love story in it and to declare the two a couple.

The wedding was performed with a priest reading Vedic verses. The peepal tree was draped in a white cloth  made the groom while the banyan tree wearing a colorful sari was made the bride.

LOL … I am not kidding!

And then it followed by the announcements like this:


"Our forefathers did this. We are following their footsteps," said the Babaji’s priest, who played groom's father.

"We hope the marriage will last long, survive difficult circumstances and produce healthy off springs to carry on the tradition of hope and happiness," a middle aged lady, the bride's mother, said. 

“Off springs?? They would surely name it as peeban? Or banpee? Or would the nick name it as BP”... I was too excited …


Along with me, there were few dozens of people attended the ceremony. A feast was also organized. Kumar, who acted as the bride's father, said: "I arranged everything for the marriage. I spent nearly `1 lakh. I believe marrying the two auspicious trees will bring peace and prosperity."

Ok stop guessing... They did certainly serve the vegetarian food but not peepal and banyan dishes...

But this one was ultimate! They served us Rasgulla,  the best ones. K couldn’t resist asking for more. Kumar uncle serving us told  it’s the bride favorite food.

We actually went beyond the boundaries of laughing madly and fanatically.

And I am so  glad for the invite dude.. This is all dedicated to u :-) 

This is the best wedding I ever attended.

Have a hilarious Day :-)

A day without laughter is a day wasted



PS: On the other side, Peepal stands foremost amongst the sacred trees. According to common belief Lord Vishnu and other gods reside beneath them. In Sanskrit it is called Bodhi in Hindi, Marathi and Punjabi this tree is called Peepal in Bengal this is called Asvattha and Gujaratis call it Piplo. In Oriyan culture this is Mui Chifka tree. In the Deccan, Telugu-speaking devout call it Pippali and in Kanarese this is Arali. Finally, the Keralites call it Al or Aryal in Malayalam language. The ritual of getting the peepal with banyan is the most prominent in Orissa, West Bengal and Kerala.