Heart-Heat-hot!

Your whole world lies within you. The outer world is the manifestation of what is going on inside. The Power lies within you. Don’t think what others do, act & say, always travel on your desired path with your beliefs, loving & kindness to everyone coming on your way. Be happy for small things which will someday turn into bigger one. Have Patience & say to yourself something good going to happen today

Years of life in that city also never made me this twitchy as it is making me now. Feels like a haunted spoof. Well… I believed this is a day even the “I” was conquered by the desire. Yes, the ego in me also got in terms with the desire. 1000 feelings of this little churning heart, twirling around the mind probably struck harder than the labor pain and soother than the morning breeze. Hanging between the both, it needed just a patient calm heart to strike the equilibrium. Then I closed my eyes and imagined that situation how it would be, seen the world it would be, visualized the desire I want it to be and seized those thoughts as belief and was set to get sunk in those positive waves.

Breaking those age old contemplations was not easy, cracking those mental precincts was not easy and crossing those boundaries of distance is not easy yet the minute faith in today is tomorrow’s treasure. Well…thinking of tomorrow is again a long process while living the moment of the day as the last moment of the life is what was clinching.

Then comes the wisdom of life with different kinds of games .If you don’t play any, you won’t be able to understand the game. Only if you play well, you can jump to the next level. Without facing the music, you wouldn’t learn the dance and without taking risks, life wouldn’t be same as it ought to be.

So with a big risk of life, with a heart full of desire and mind full of confidence and with an attitude of “Just live today”, I pack my bags to that city which gave my LOVE a shelter and my dream a chance to live. It is just another travel but a very memorable travel! Unexpected is the expected flavor of every journey J

PS:  Actually no. The post wasn’t about you. But hey, if the shoes fit in right, wear it:-P

The Normal Theory !

When I say normal theory I mean that’s exactly what it’s not because the theory talks about how nothing is normal which includes this theory obviously.

Fine so here goes…

What is normal...?

Something that is common to everyone... but by default no two individuals are the same, so there is no question of there being features common to all people, or even most of the people. Even if for a moment you assume that there is a feature ‘x’ which one person has, and define that as normal; in that case, as one may notice, that feature will not be present in the same way in almost any other individual, because every individual is unique in his or her own way. So in that case everyone else will be classified as abnormal and that in fact will become the common feature in all people. So abnormality is the only thing that is normal and hence there is no normal except abnormal in itself.

Now you may choose to look at it in a more simplified, absolute, and practical manner.

What is normal mathematically?

A line that is perpendicular to a given line, or a line that lies at an angle that is not inclined to any side. By that definition, a normal person will be one who is not inclined to any side in any sense. Now a 'normal' person will have no inclinations whatsoever and that is an impossibility because there are many things a person will be inclined to.Could be something as lame as “Do I like ice cream or not?". I am not normal so I can say I like ice cream but a 'normal' person cannot say that he likes or that he dislikes it has to be in the middle. Now in such simple cases, one might find exceptions. For example, take me and chocolate.. I don’t particularly like chocolate, but I don’t dislike it either.

But looking into more serious issues like life, it is impossibility for one to be normal, as the opposite of life is afterlife (not death). Now I have never met a person who is not alive and not in his afterlife (if an afterlife exists). Or for purposes of simplification a normal person cannot not be alive and or not be dead at the same time as that is a practical impossibility.

To look at it another way, people are said to be normal if their behaviour conforms to the standard behaviour set in society and in life. Therefore to be “normal” is to act parallel to everyone else. But now, blatantly using semantics, normal means perpendicular. Therefore to act normal is to act at an absolute tangent to everyone else’s behaviour, which is abnormal… Therefore, normal is abnormal… If that’s too mind boggling for you, take it that normal does not exist...

So what have we learnt??

Normal= 90 degrees

or,

Normal= 0 degrees

or,

Normal= Abnormal

or,

Normal= nil.

Take your pick…

The Most UN(answered) Questions Of The World!

I have been wondering if I can ever get answers for these...then I found the genius K who can answer my every question. My instant reaction would be (* wooooowww* u r suchaaaa Einstein* muaaahhhh … U r just the light in my life…) probably that might be in a hypothetical situation .

Well, certainly reality is * bang-my-head * expression and *kill me * expression.

OK! Here are few such questions and genius answers. ** Evil Smirk** uahhahahhaha!

Q. Are unripe oranges called greens?

A.  They are called yellow and ripen one is called red. (Shades of colors)

Yeah! I totally got you: P… Aage bado

Q. Can it be a mistake that "desserts" gives "stressed" spelled backwards?

A. No, it’s happy coincidence just like having you for a coffee.

Oh..For coffee episode...u need to talk to K …he would explain it better:- D.. Specially the CCD one: -P or drop me a mail…

Q. Crime doesn't pay . . . does that mean that my job is a crime?

A. Probably it is not under law, which is why it broke the equality.

(Everyone is equal in eyes of law is meant! Ok…I got your * kill me * expression)

Q. Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?

A. Such an unexpected way of expecting answer.

Q. Do fish get thirsty?

A. No because they are not followers of Morarji Desai Urine Therapy.

Q. Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

A. They don’t bother, the just drink the served soup.

Q. Do penguins have knees?

A. They don’t need to have because they are not going to get wedded in Indian tradition where you fall on knees for everything.

 Yaaayyyyy ! Join the club of insanity... Imagine my plight, he is my boy friend!

Q. Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

A. Yeah, just after I fell in love with you.

*Rolling eyes*

Q. How do you get off a non-stop flight?

A. When “Nan” (Tamil) tells to stop.

Q. If mummies are from Egypt, then from where are daddies from?

A. From bio shock series  

* Do-u –mind –stuffing –ur –geekness –below –the belt* expression

Q. If a brown cow eats green grass why is it's milk white?

A. Because it shits black.

*U r SICK* U need help !

Q. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

A. On their Seats (buttocks)

Q. If a man with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, would it be considered a hostage situation?

A. Should wait till his personality splits in a cop.

Q. If beef comes from a cow and ham from a pig, why do they put beef in hamburgers?

A. To sell it in Hamburg (forget not the grin he gave after the answer)

Q. If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?

A. They are also in shape. RoundJ

Q. If there's so much laborsaving machinery, why don't I have more free time?

A. Employee Engagement

Q. If you're going at the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

A. Question invalid if I am on harry potter’s broomstick.

* Utter Maniacness *

Q. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

A. Probably that is why I was spared by my last date.

Q. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges?

A. Easy! Suck out the water along with the sponges and release them to measure.

Q. What do you do when you discover an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?

A. I will try not endangering me.

* Fu***ing! What’s the logic??*

Q. Where does the white go when the snow melts?

A. To the Snow White

Q. Why call it a building if it's already been built?

A. Because they don’t know tenses.

 * Kill me * expression 

Q. Why does night fall but never break and day break but never fall?

A. Day has a heart. It loves moons. Hearing this night trips and falls since it is dark.

Q. Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

A. To show that the one who puts it on is not dumb

* Lamest of the all *

Q. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

A. Watch Rush hour series to get some light

Q. Name a fly without wings?

A. Walk

Q. Do you love me because I am beautiful or I am beautiful because you love me?

A. Absurd question because neither of the things are true.

 *aarrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*

Well...that is it about my genius counterpart: D ..the so called Agastya of contemporary world. 

I understand your excitement in meeting him … Sure! Why not: D . The day is not very far!

You are so special!

Right now happiness is just rising up in height like a butterfly.Beautiful.Free. It is for me to see, feel and enjoy. Never to possess. If you try to own it, you kill it.

Like my Appaji told, live like there is no tomorrow. Do what you want to do. Tell the people close to you how much they matter and how much you love them. Call your folks every day. Because there will come a day when you want to, but it may be too late.

Here I just want to thank all those wonderful people of my life for giving me such beautiful moments; certain memories that keep playing over and over again.

Every happy day I lead, is the sacrifice he gave for my better upbringing. I wish I can tell him that “your smile is sunshine, enough to light my days, steal my heart and keep it warm with your endearing ways.
You are my precious little charisma, with a sweetness that filled my years with laughter and life with lots of love”.

Appaji, you are the true hero of my life J

You show me the world through your eyes
Through you I learn such a whole lot.
Kindness, patience, tolerance
Are some of the things you gently taught

Along with  tasting the nectar of your compassionate heart!

You let me go gently knowing

That the mistakes I make will help me learn

But sometimes watching is so hard

To protect me forever, with deep yearn.

No matter how big I become

For you I am always a baby

To shield with your prayers

Of every happiness, every joy

Let’s Snig it!

Well, these are utterly random snigs where a bunch of maniacs and I tried bringing out. Few are also adapted.

ACCELERATION DUE TO GRAVITY-Extra tweeting speed caused by mobile Twitter applications
ANTIBODY - against everybody

BATDRAFTING-The practice of using a mini drafter as a make-believe cricket bat and playing a cover drive
BARGAIN-Money you gain due to the mistake in the bill in the bar

BACKLOG-A to-do list of people who're behind you

BENIGN - what you be after you be eight
BOWEL - letters like a,e,i,o,u (bongs)
BALLOTKAAR-What Booth Capturing and Poll rigging do to democracy

BLAST FROM THE PAST- A fart that smells like yesterday's food

BOTTOMLINE- Tight underpants leaving stretch marks

CALORIE-METRY-Every time a girl goes on diet...and emerges fatter than ever..!!!

CAESARIAN SECTION - a district in Rome
CAT SCAN - searching for lost kitty
CENSUS-LESS-NESS (N.)- A peculiar kind of population survey that puts housewives, prostitutes and beggars in the same category

CHILDBERTH-Giving up your seat in the train to a kid

CHEMYSTERY- The unintelligible solution that you just created by Spanish interjection
CHEMYTH-The ill-conceived notion that the rest of the college has that Chemical Engineering is all about Chemistry
CHIT -Memory-joggers designed for the benefit of exam-takers. Production of these is considered an illegal activity: D
CHITREADING-The fine art of reading exam chits (refer definition above). Highly esoteric, and can be understood only be the writer. Requires eyesight of high microscopic abilities

CHRONIC - neck of a crow

CROCAINE - Smashed crocin to be snorted.

COPYWRITER- Person availing of chits. Not related to advertising.
COMA - punctuation mark
CORTISONE - area around local courthouse
CYST - short for sister

DESK-MS-The ability to type SMS with the phone below the table and not looking at the screen.
DESKITTI- The ubiquitous scribbling and works of arts of Michelangelo-to-be that you find on every piece of furniture in college.
DADLINE-The unrealistic deadline of 9PM on a Saturday Night, set by the dad of course

DIAGNOSIS - person with a slanted nose
DUODENUM - couple in jeans

ELASTIC BAND-The ever-changing college music Group: D
ELECTROMYSTERY- The phenomenon of absence of electricity in Electrical Engineering Classrooms: O
ENTRAINING-The Ramaiah-like torture we all went through to get our asses out here in the first place
EXSHAM- A test paper that gets leaked and sullies the name of the university.

ENEMA - not a friend
EPIC FAIL-When you can't pass an exam on the Mahabharat

FALSE LABOR - pretending to work
FOURIER TRANSFORM -Transformation into engineer of a student due to the 4 years of mental torture at the engineering college.

FENG SHOOOEEEEEEEY- The art of properly placing pigs so that they win fatness competitions

GHAT FEELING-Just knowing that there are mountains near you

GRAPH-I-TEA: The peculiar designs obtained when chaai is spilled on your lab record.
GYMNAUSEUM: The odor emanating from the sweatshirts of guys who work out.

GALL BLADDER - bladder in a girl
GENES - blue denim

HERNIA - she is close by
HYMEN - greeting to several males
HYPERBOLA-A person who talks so much at a given time

H1N1B-What you get when you combine Swine Flu and US Visas
HUNKLE-An Uncle who thinks he looks like a Hunk

HOODIE-BABA-A Swami wearing a sweatshirt

IMPOTENT - distinguished, well-known
INEBRYTHM: The drunken dance at every college fest, late at night. Generally performed by strange species from the Mens' Hostel
iPEED- What Steve Jobs would say after going to the loo

INTERCOURSE-What you have in between starters and the main course

IPILL-Pill to treat psychological illnesses caused by Apple products/IPL

JETTY LAG-Victoria's Secret model that had to go to the ICU after a 20-hour flight

KOO-RESISTOR: The person who, oblivious of the wild jeering from the crowd, continues singing/dancing/mimicking/whatevering straight-faced!

LABOR PAIN - hurt at work
LACTOSE - person without digits on the foot
LIPOSUCTION - a French kiss
LYMPH - walk unsteadily

LECTURE- The art of transferring notes from the professor's book to the female students' book without passing through the minds of either.

MALLPRACTICE: The art of skipping class for shopping.
MECHALOMANIA: The undying spirit that ties Mechanical students together.
MECHALCOHOLOMANIA: The *spirit* that ties Mechanical students together.
MAN-O-METER- Scale to gauge masculinity. Usually found in 'bars'

MICROBES - small dressing gowns

MARGIN-A line between the buyer and the seller

METTLEHEAD-Very brave person who loves metal

MUTTER PANEER-The softest spoken Indian side-dish ever

MY NAME ISKCON- SRK's movie on how he became a devout Krishna follower

NINETYNINE-POINT SOMEONE: The guy who cracks GATE/CAT from every Batch: D
NAAKNOWTECHNOLOGY: The science of studying about yourself
NORMALIZATION-The *standardization* of lab experiment values. Standard values may be obtained from any senior's lab record. (Of course, this means that the first ever batch are the only people to have ever *done* the experiment.)
NOVELIZATION-The art of reading a novel in class.

OBESITY - City of OBE

PRON-Adult films for fish

PUNNILINGUS-The act of mouthing excellent puns

POOPCORN-*Adult content alert*-your digestive repercussion during constipation

PROTEIN - in favor of teens
PULSE - grain
PUS - small cat
PIKACHUTIYA- Annoying Indian Pokemon

POKER FACE- The expression that you see on those compelled to sit on the first bench for whatever reasons, while they sleep with their eyes open

ROFL-MAO-How the Chinese react to an internet joke

RICE AND SHINE: The horror of finding rice being served in for breakfast in hostels.
REPERCUSSIONS –After effects of the drummer quitting, and then changing his mind and coming back

REFARTEE- A response to a real stinker

SIMBIOSIS: The person in college who effortlessly uses two SIMs with his phone...
SOFTSH*T: The bull crap that you say during software interviews that you wouldn't dream of saying otherwise ("Software is booming! Of course I want to stay with ******* all my life! MBA?! What's that?")
SPONSORSH*T: The hell that all students have to go through, begging people all over the town, for their upcoming departmental fest.
SARI-DON -The no-tension guy who heads the Conjeevaram Silk Mafia

STAR BUCKS- Financial news channel that's up all day long

SARCHASM-The wide gap between people who get it and those who don't

SECRETION - hiding anything
SERUM - sailors' drink
SUBCUTANEOUS - not cute enough
SUPARIMAN- If Clark Kent were to become a hitman for the mob

SAP ANALYST-Person who studies plant goo

THERMOCOUPLE: The *hottest* couple in college: D
TURBAN DICTIONARY- Repository of Navjot Singh Sidhu's vocabulary

THOORING TEST- A test to determine if a Machine can bullshit like an MBA grad

THENGUE FEVER -When you get tired of people thanking you in mildly played-around-with English

TAYLOR SWIFT (Tail-her-Swift)-What you tell the cabbie when you're chasing a girl you like

TABLET - small table
TUMOR - extra pair

ULTRASOUND - radical noise

WEEDLI - Idli made with weed. Indian version of Hash Brownies
WARNER BROTHERS- Siblings that is quite liberal in giving others a heads up

ZZZZZZ: The sound you hear from the back bench during most lectures.

Words are a bit muffled, almost as if they are being placed under a pillow upon which sits a stupid, fat, smiling dog

My regular travels and hang outs with people has made me write this; my only way to vent out the true fascination for you all. Your behavior puzzles my little brain. Sometimes I stop gazing in daze at you all. It forces me to reconsider principles which I long believed to simply be beyond change.

First I would want to thank the wonderful species called BOYS.I swear, you are the most entertaining crowd I have even seen. But honestly I lay in all those doubts that have been troubling my otherwise peaceful existence.

1.       What is with all the pony tails? Genuinely. What makes you think that it looks good? Or are you trying to look creative? Or are all of you trying to show your metro sexuality or whatever it is that you must have read in ToI’s latest fashion advice column? Moment of honesty: It looks fuckin retarded. Really. And don’t even think of pulling out the head band. You are not Ronaldinho and you sure as fukin hell like the Chotta Bheem.

2.        Just a benefit of doubt.  Why do all of you purposely buy t-shirts one size small or are all of you particularly short of cash? Is there some sort of shortage of cloth in and around the country? I am sorry but I really do not want to see how cold you are feeling, if you know what I mean. And all you bulging biceps chappies better be it crappies, save it for the gym dude.

3.        What is it with the drinking in the car thingy? Not allowed to drink in front of mommy, are we? Heard about something which is commonly referred to as a “bar”? Well they exist, trust me: these perfectly legal (sometimes stinky) places where you can drink your way to full talli levels. Try it out for a change.

4.       Why is it that if I stare deep into your eyes [hypothetically] I find a deep cavern of mind-numbing dumbness? It is almost like looking into the eyes of a lab rat. I can actually see the brain [very, very basic model] crunching away squeaking with effort every time any non-monosyllabic word is uttered.

5.       Why do you open your mouths? Trust me, you would be far successful with the ladies if you just kept silent, pouted once in a while and maybe grunt a “yaa” every now and then.

6.       What is with the whole riding bikes while wearing chaddis thing? The ultimate [pronounced ulti-maaate yaar] is the boxer-baniyan combo where you get to see ample amounts of leg and chest/back hair.

Now, I come to those set of people who are called the baby –dolls, probably in the alien planet. Trust me; you gals are no less to be called elegant bear of THE BRAVE.I mean the mommy bear.

1.       What is with that hair? chidiya ka ghosla ?seriously . What’s with those retard colors on them? Ask me about it, you’re no close to that COOL look ah.

2.       Use stoles and clothes but not blankets. Spare it for home purpose.

3.       You eating junk is no amusement for people in and around 2 streets. So shut the fuckin drama of jumping, creeping and yelling.

4.       What do your bags contain? Really. Do you stomp the entire house into the bag and bring? Why are they so huge and heavier than u, li’l birds?

5.       What is the overflowing thick goo from your faces? Is it something to do for you good looking? Trust me; you guys look so vampire-ish that sometimes all of you together budge into my dreams.

Almost my every evening went spending with couples and for next few days till I am here, will be the same. So before I go meet few more, here is my open love for all you guys!

Yes. You, my dear couples!

Stop feeling sorry for me. Stop trying to set me up. If I need your assistance, I will ask. Promise.

Stop making out in front of me (pretty please?).

Stop looking so lovey dovey that it makes me want to puke.

Stop dressing alike. You have no idea how incestuous it really looks.

Stop using your precious nicknames in front of me. I really, really, really don’t wanna know what poochie woochie did to your goochi hoochie. I swear.

Stop inviting me to your meals. I don’t need no kebab to feel the haddi if you know what I mean. And last of all, stop sharing every fuckin detail of your lives with each other.Tell one of you something and get a response from the other! In fri'gin seconds.

What the bloody fuck man?

A little bit of me ..

Well not everyone can be lucky to have great realizations of life. Its only rain most of the times, caused the greatest consciousness of rush in hormones in me. Now if you ask me what exactly that means… hold on …I have a real different explanation for this.

This is what happened to me when I’m close to the end my school life. I have had some serious problems of life. Everything was so weird to me. I mean every possible existence of the world.

1. Childhood friends are forever and they are the only one who would go to any extent to win a chocolate. .For example: dare the sumo of the class for arm wrestling .We also wear the same color clothes to show our love for each other

2. Teachers are people. They are also humans. If not, they teach mathematics.

3. High school is a little piece of your adult education. It is practicable only during bachelors. If you did not, you are either zombie or you are a juvenile stuck in a boobster.

4. Everyone is different. Everyone is unique. Few are mad, few are disoriented and few are fanatics but all are your friends.

5. Ghosts do not exist. If existing, they come only when bunch of friends’ night out and talk about them. Oh wait... these are night ghosts. Day ghosts are those who wait at the school gates like jackasses to track us where we are, colloquially called as watch men.

6. You don’t get pregnant if you kiss unlike shown in desi movies.

7. Google and Wikipedia are only sources for any information. Any information which are censored in biology books.

8. Text books are the black and white version of your teachers. They are never entertaining and cannot be too.

9. Propose means ...”I LOVE U”

10. Siblings are nothing but crude version of mythological villains. They are born to hate u. So are their friends.

11. Gays and Lesbians are also some breed of human not any species of dogs.

12. School means not only 1st to 10th standard. There are various other schools also.

13. Even if you have a boy friend, you can still talk to other male species.

14. Fuck and Sex are not biology.

15. Principal hails from other planet and mathematics teachers too. English teachers are from heaven.

16. X is not just a letter, it is the attitude. Wtf?

17. Best moments are not to be caught even while sleeping in History class.

18. Best bike in the world is your bicycle which you pedal it to school.

19. Chemistry is no more a subject. It has a greater meaning.

20. Well… What I talk is mostly Nonsense-aaya Namaha: D and my biograhy is nothing but chronicles of Dementia.