2012 - Reviewed and Revisited

It’s been a long-drawn battle with time, and I finally won. A crappy year ends and a hopeful, new one begins. There were so many instances in 2012 when I thought that things couldn’t get worse, and each time I was proven wrong. I have laughed, cried, fought, been cheated, cheated myself, been lied to, lied myself and finally, searched for the eternal peace which has seemed just barely out of reach for so long. The past year has had occasions of absolute bliss and considerable misery for me, and I will very glad to end this year on a good note, with friends, lovely strangers and a lot of well-earned chocolates.

2012 began for me on a fairly good note, with a job offer at a promising firm. Just a couple of months down the line, I realized my mistake and it was too late to rectify it. The company turned out to be a nightmarish hell-hole managed by lesser mortals and run by an insect. After being sucked dry, my will to go forth and survive took over and I quit the garage. Things got really interesting after that, and I decided to go for my MBA in Germany.

On the personal front, things couldn’t get stranger than they did in 2011. I had a lot of illusions shattered this year when the man who claimed was in love with me turned out to be nothing more than that – an illusion. I made a few bad decisions. I realized that money plays a vital role in deciding how long you can love someone. So, on a fateful day this year, I lost someone very close to me and made me wonder if he ever was capable of loving someone.

Just when I thought I’d give up hope on 2012 being a good year, I rediscovered what it was to fall in love with someone totally unexpected. A fresh feeling of puppy love, evolving into lust and desire and at this point of time, to a steady state of mutual understanding, trust and faith, made me a believer again. Here’s a warm bear hug to the one I’m in love.

If I were to send one message to 2012 and all its incidents and people, all it’s merry and misery, it would be this: Good riddance to bad rubbish. I can’t wait to enter the New Year. I’m ever the optimist, cautiously pessimistic and according to my friends, annoyingly pragmatic.

I also had some social life which improvised the levels of insanity year by year in me. This time, those insane trends fuelled up my craziness.

 Excessive 9gagging: Over the past year, 9gag has become a trend statement of sorts with all kinds of memes being made popular by a very large percentage of the world’s population. Being a 9gagger has become a matter of pride for some and a matter of principle for others. Excessive 9gagging has shown to result in involuntary drooling, day dreaming during work.  I think Pinterest is also one of such kinds of different league.

Facebook Marriages: More and more people are getting ‘married’ on Facebook these days. In 2012, there were 119 recorded marriages on the social networking site in my list. If you like someone very much and want to get married to that person but can’t afford a wedding, then the trend smith recommends a Facebook marriage – change your relationship status to ‘Married’ and indicate the person you want to marry. Once that other person (hopefully your better half) has reciprocated this action, your statuses will be updated for the whole world to see. Am damn serious, this actually happened… well…honestly with me only.Now that it is a trend, hunt is easier on FB than on Matrimony sites.

The Flash Mob Phenomenon:The mob has many heads but no brains. Or so they say. The last four months of 2012 saw an exponential rise in the number of randomly arranged flash mobs in India, US, UK and Australia. Most of the flash mobs were centred on people dancing to or singing a popular trending song. There are all the indicators that the Flash Mob culture will rise strongly and will involve people from all walks of life to behave like idiots for a few minutes.

Status Messages: There was an astronomical increase in the number of people searching for the phrase ‘best status messages’ on Google. It’s probably the influx of innumerable brain alternatives that people these days are not able to think smartly for themselves. Sadly, some of the best status messages on IMs and social networking sites are re-hashed nonsense.

Well time to get something original and something new .

Till the writing stops, or refreshes a new, till thoughts are written forever and some are followed through. Till the very end is unending it will always be yours to keep, like the things that vanish somehow and yet a footprint they leave. Anyways wish you all a very happy new year . Rock it J

With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts.
Eleanor Roosevelt.

Moods

Slipping the bonds of earth

I dance in joy with the silvered wings

To do a thousand things;

No matter the shinning sun joined the tumbling mirth

But it is the story of every birth.

It is a story of a lady wing

Wheeling in the swing

Chasing the wind with the sling

 But it flew away in a ding.

Suddenly, windswept heights with easy grace

With a high encroached sanctity of space

Brings a smile on my face

Then comes a face stare at me in maze

I care not and walk my phase.

Then comes the sculpture of love sow

Of which even the eagle wants to wow.

Even it’s gone with the fading joy

Then the moment seems to be a defence

And there’s deep blue silence,

Neither there is earth below, nor sky above,

Only me, my breath and my heartbeat.

 While with silent, lifting mind I’ve trod

Some sadness is part of everyone’s story,

Some sunshine is a part of everyone’s life

Eyes are damp for no reason

as every second is a new season

How to piss people off?

 Of course! It’s an art to do on daily basis. As I have already told you that it needs effort to be stupid than not being it. And the best part is stupidity +Ego= Heights. I really want to tell you about a person who have been living with a motto of pissing people off all the time! It’s much like the song ‘Iris’ by Goo Goo Dolls, where he croons, “…yeah you bleed just to know you’re alive!” And his golden words are- “we need to irritate people around us all the time to feel alive. What’s the point of living if you don’t piss someone off? Huh? Tell me”!

Pissing people off – the heart and soul of his existence. So here I present tips learnt from this great soul would have mastered the art.

 We wouldn’t be here doing what we are doing if someone a hundred thousand years ago hadn’t pissed someone off and started a war. We wouldn’t be here if someone hadn’t pissed on someone else’s joy! You wouldn’t be reading this if someone hadn’t pissed me off and made me write this. So, you have to agree with me that it’s quite important to piss people off all the time. (I see...)So, how do we do it? How do we achieve the perfect balance between pissing someone off and not getting slapped, shot, kicked, stabbed in the back, kicked, slapped, slapped, punched in the face, kicked in the nuts again or pushed off a cliff? It takes great care and patience to achieve this feat, and it’s not easy. You need to pay attention. For gals, you need no effort, just go and talk your heart out during your period cycle. That serves all the purpose!

Pissing Men Off

Quite Easy- take a dig at their manhood. Tell them their girlfriends are awesome and hot. Take the liberty in explicitly describing her. Watching their face go from a normal beige to various shades of red, blue and orange is quite fun. Men are strange in this issue – I don’t know why but they always overplay their sexual exploits and this is the best way to piss a man off.

Talk about their EX girlfriends and their extemporary desires for every damn silly gal. At that time you correct them on what they are doing, I am sure they will get defensive and fart out their ego. Of course, what else they can do.  Point out every mistake of theirs, then your mission is accomplished.

Of course, the only two other things that matter to a guy is either beer or sports. Ridicule his favourite beer and you might end up on the wrong end of a well-placed kick. Ridicule the guy and call him a sissy for watching cricket or golf, and he’ll go stark raving mad.

I’ll let you in on a secret. If you know a guy who is straight and want to piss him off, accuse him of being gay. Oh, he’ll hate you for the rest of his life, and he’ll stay away from cosmetics and watch each of his words carefully whenever you’re around!

Pissing Women Off

Specially, you should know how to piss off a gal from the guy who did it!

Given that sex, booze and sports are the only three things that can effectively piss a man off, you’ll find it hard to piss a woman off with these three topics. Women are usually very secure about their sexuality/sex lives and taking a dig at their alcoholic tastes will be like throwing grains of sand at a hurtling train hoping to derail it. And women and sports, well, let me not be a spoilsport, but you know how it goes. Till I was 18, I thought F1 cars were battery controlled toys and unmanned!

So, how do we piss women off? Easy – take a dig at her age. It always works no exceptions. Tell her, “Oh, you look so much younger in your photographs!” and she’ll hate you with a vehemence second only to a supernova.

Horizontal attacks are also effective. “You seem to have gained some weight,” “Is that an extra-large top?” and “How many months due are you?” are the three most effective way to piss a woman off about her weight. Never fails.

These are way too trivial. You should try something like this guy did. Be a guy with half knowledge, wavering mind and untidily maintained and flaunt off saying it’s a geek style.

Secondly, talk utter nonsense and claim you are next to Einstein the world, no perhaps the GOD. Adding to it, go challenge her skills where she was awarded the prime laurels. Be on the other side of the world burning with jealousy. Finally, say you are the ego killer. LOL! She would definitely kick in your nuts but if she is sensible enough, she would just laugh at u and show your level.

But I am duty bound to warn you – Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Be careful.

Psychology says women are way too matured, organised and talented than other men of their age. So panga with gals might cost a huge loss for you, honey! You still wanna do, go ahead! Piss someone off today! Live a little!

Attitude you receive from a person is how you treat them!

Another song , from Germany

If you don't speak your thoughts, they can't be turned around.

This is a small dedication to someone special who is so close yet so far!

I don't know what that means, but I know that I mean it :-)

https://soundcloud.com/sandhya-datta/raabta-raabta?utm_source=soundcloud&utm_campaign=share&utm_medium=facebook&utm_content=https%3A%2F%2Fsoundcloud.com%2Fsandhya-datta%2Fraabta-raabta&code=AQBKlYbZ3OtcYgruqokkP1NyJbPTtGVugTonjq_p4_aAOaoPeJ9UJ5ltrQYywflFVLREpHuYBpYCYnG4Uflzu5riZL9k_8ERMLGcD4p4XLbq7uoSsVg3Fg3L16K71wFTBH8VLWmXzMZHSfO_H7RYxiRPjWg60daqJO2Wt_mKqoN1i3wehBAek4ueLnE6PY1Vn7L0T7fg5pYqBGNkHuxE6Cgu#_=_

Best ...may be it is called Love...

 Your parents are really nice yaa

“Well what did you expect?” he asked.

I just thought they would be grown up versions of you.

Like the others, this one also went for a toss, Rejection no# 39

I may sound snobby, arrogant and egoistic but what you see is not always true.

There is this series of things that is happening in my life since a year.

I don’t know peer pressure or probably it was too hard to handle my hotness, my family and extended family started groom hunt for me.Well, I met over dozen of people so far and every time I meet someone, they ask me to be judgemental and I can’t stop using the stupidity index (For more info refer previous post). Finally I gave up the idea of meeting random stupids when I had a lot waiting in my inbox every morning. After a thorough investigation and scrutiny, Sandiee’s angels and Demons fight club has shortlisted top three stupids. Here I present my sample mails. 

Short-listed -1:

You are my TVS SCOOTY and also my AIWA. I am BPL and you are SANSUI. You are Mc DOWLE'S love.   I believe in FRESHIA and you are one of the most beautiful girls in this world. I think of you day and night. When you give me your only one smile, you are DOMINO'S PIZZA for me. This is a COLGATE ENERGY GEL feeling for me.

   I would like you to be my life partner. I think you are worried about your father who is KAWASAKI BAJAJ CALIBER and you think of my father who is CEAT, but don't worry. I am also FORD IKON and rest of your family members are KELVINATOR. If they will say no, we will run away, marry and try to do PHILIPS .They will get MIRINDA and we will have COCA COLA.

   Trust in God who is NOKIA for those who love each other. And believe me, we are WILLS. We might have to BOLERO. However after some time, our love will be SAMSUNG DIGITAL. We are HERO HONDA of our love life.

 Now HUNDAI is the song of love. You must know that love is DIARY MILK, SATYAM ONLINE , PARX and also AMUL. For me life is HOME TRADE. So never forget me. Ok bye! I wrote little but PEPSI.

From Your Dearest,

LG

I sincerely appreciate your mock test paper for my marketing exam. Yeppie ! It worked.

Shortlisted -2 :

Aap hua ..mera 

Dream wala girl

Is liye aap ke liye likha meine

Gana wala song

Dream wala duet

Sharukh wala, foreign wala , budget wala song

poolon se bhi halka sa

lyrics wala song

Gane wala love

Dream sequence ke bahane, tumko Switzerland dikhaunga

Barf wala snow

Paise wala rich

Chupke se public place pe, dhoka deke chance marne

Despo wala chap

Maine naav bharke phool, barf pe rakhe hain

Mere peeche pink ped laga hai laga

Low angle shot se haat hua bada aur  ..main lambaaa

Naav wala boat

Phhol wala pyaar

Mere baalon mein itne saare jooen hein, katte rahte mujhjo din raat

DUkh wala sad

Ye chap tere peeche phir bhaagta,  hai bachatha …MANISH CHANCHAD!

Pyaar wala romance

Gana wala song

Ishq wala love.

Yaar… pakao wala peeling

Ishq wala Torture

Shortlisted -3 :

Dear Sandiee,

I have some questions to be clarified before that what is your full name ?

1.       Would it be too early to hold hands?

2.       Am I at the “honey point” yet?

3.       Let me know if I am rushing you, ok? *

Thank you for saying yes. The usual answers I get is no ways, are you stupid ?; No I already have a boyfriend or sometimes am I too shy to ask a girl out.

*I haven’t had a lot of girlfriends yet but teach me how to do , what to do and what not to do ! please!

 Seriously ??? * face-palm*

Yeah right! Exactly …you all are awesome guessers … I have blocked my calendar to meet these awesome guys!  Take liberty to subscribe to the forthcoming posts on my experiences J

Sometimes this is the way of life.

It just stuck my mind amongst all these exams, sleepless nights, those language communications; I completed my 3 months of adventurous stay in this foreign land.

Did not know how time flew, 

yesterday was the only time of life that I knew.

Today felt like a kite flying with no worries,

 touching several clusters of my dreams

along the shades of sun in so different means.

Although, bounded by the surprise of the days,

like the freedom of the haze in maze,

 it is an innocent story 

of this dreamland glory 

to live life so flowery, 

which is blown in a flurry.

Touching every emotion

coupled with caution

Loneliness is what I feel

In this drought heal

Nobody knows am I moving closer or apart?

But the remoteness remained

Like the distance between our eyes

Yet the wishes had never gained

that hotness of the dice.

A day without dealing with stupid people is like...never mind it can never happen !

This incident happened sometime last year, and I still remember it vividly. Stupids are so hard to forget. It was supposed to be a surprise. Or a suspense. Whichever one wasn’t creepy.. I was supposed to present myself at the remote location in one hour in Bangalore. Yeah, right, I thought. With this traffic, I can make it just in time for a perfect sunset. Three in the afternoon on the roads of Bangalore is like being killed and transported to Hell and made to push a huge, heavy wheel for no apparent reason, with a red, pointy-tailed, French-bearded individual who laughed demonically for no reason and lashed you with a whip every now and then, with your sweat dripping off your face and crusts of dirt and tar sticking to every part of your face. Well, almost.

I thought I can still make it with an unwanted sarcasm-kicked philosopher who was supposedly my colleague. But when two NORMAL people meet, we almost have a research guide to be administrated about people and their stupidity. Although I was quite disinterested at that point of time, but when it is about stupid I can’t deny my participation. U see, it’s easy to be dumb but not stupid! They amuse me!

K to me: “Do you know we have evolved into something resembling a cross between an upright chimp and a hairy stink ball? I’m not kidding.”

Me: Really ? hehe..

K: In fact I think everyone is. Have you counted the number of hairs on your body lately? You’ll be astonished. Well... it is different for gals. That’s why my thorough and fair research is mostly on men.

Anyway, when Charles Darwin wrote the ‘Origin Of species,’ he overlooked one major fact – The Stupidity Index. ‘The Stupidity Index,’ which explained why every single human being alive today is as stupid as a doorknob (in other words Dakkan). People who don’t agree to this fact are living in denial.

The scale is from 0 to 5, where 0 is the least stupid and 5 is the most stupid.

Then he takes out his neat clear paper from the file and tables it down with his explanations.

Although I am sure about the parameters he is considering but my gut feeling is this guy is no less to A and apparently …it is so much of astonishment to be with people of same league.

The scale is explained thus:






Me: ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING. Lets try it on na ! How it works ...


While we waited for more than ten minutes at a junction where a truck was stranded in the middle of the road with two-wheelers peppered around it like seasoning on a horrendous Christmas dish.

Before we could assess their stupidity rate,“Hey Sandiee,” said the idiot over the phone.

“Hey dude,” I replied, silently wishing he’d never called. I hated this guy, and had tried to distance myself as much as possible from him. But, as you probably know, some people just don’t get it.

“Listen, this is important,” said the Stupid. “You need to be here! It’s urgent”

“Whoa!” I said. “If you remember we are in Bangalore? I’m not trying to relax at home but in my rickety car at a junction since an hour ”

No matter what I tried, he wouldn’t give in. I finally agreed to meet him.

It’s not that I’m an anti-social animal, I just hate this guy.

I called up the fellow and told him that I’d reached. It was two minutes to three. He came there two minutes later, running, and hot in the face. He’s a weird looking guy – tall, balding and a thin hairline mustache. And his eyes were a constant reminder of his inborn idiocy. He was always an idiot – slow to grasp things and concepts and slower to understand them. Now, he was working for a software company. God save software!

“Thanks for coming, gal!” he said.

“No problem,” I said. “Ok, what’s this all about?”

“Listen, I’m into a scheme where you can make lots of money in a week. Up to twenty thousand in a week! Are you interested?”

You can imagine what went through my brain. I looked around for a sizable stone to bash his head in, but refrained myself. Too many witnesses around. I could never make it look like a suicide.

“What?” I asked, incredulously.

“Yeah! This new company is giving away money, dude. I asked you to come here because I want you to attend a presentation, which the company is giving. They’ll explain exactly how you can make the money. It’s quite simple, dude. And I get a referral fee is you sign up.”

“What?” I asked again. I was beginning to eye some really nice stones.

“Yes,” he said. “Follow me.”

He led us to a hotel which was behind the Shopper’s Stop mall. Lots of people were hanging around the entrance. “These are all my colleagues,” he said.

“Ok,” I said. I was really annoyed now, as most of the people there had the same stupid look in their eyes. I wanted to run away from there as fast as I could. He led us into the hotel and into an air-conditioned conference room, where there was a long table, made of cheap woodwork to match with the cheapness of the wood-paneled walls. Lots of people were sitting around it and there was a white board on the far wall, with a guy standing in front of it.

I felt like the newest inductee into the Stupidity Club where their index of stupidity is still undefined.

Cupid 's guide for Dummies

Single people are single for a reason. They are hideously ugly, dangerously misinformed about human anatomy or just plain unlucky, among other weirder reasons. For people who’re currently single, which includes me, ironically, I’ve decided to roll out a brand new strategy for attracting members of the opposite sex.

But I prefer to favour men this time with the tips so that next time someone who approaches me for a date will at least know what a women wants. 

Men, who would want to try out their luck in wooing a woman and want some inside information on how to go about doing this without being slapped in public, can read this with the assurance that you won’t be disappointed. If women want to read this, please do, it’s probably going to make you smile at how little men know about women.

Tips to Men:

Ok, first things first, my fellow readers – ask yourself the following three questions and if and only if the answer to all three is “Yes” then continue. Otherwise, this post is not for you. Women, ignore the previous two sentences.

1. Are you a man?

2. Have you ever had a crush before?

3. Was your crush a woman?

Ok, now that we’ve eliminated the kids and the fairies, let’s get down to some serious information distribution session!

Women hate nerds! Don’t show off your intelligence to women! Act dumb! Not too dumb, because that could be a huge turn-off! And for heaven sake, do not argue even you have a logic. Show them that you’re a perfectly normal, average guy, who flunks a couple of exams and yet manages to get placed in a pretty nice company. And I don’t mean a call-center! Call center guys are NOT the ‘hot trend’ nowadays!

Let’s take a hypothetical example, you’ll understand better. Suppose there is this really really hot chick whom you want to ask for a dinner. First thing you should do is to drop the idea! She’s not in your league and all the hot chicks are already taken. So, look elsewhere.

Suppose there is a fairly hot and very cute girl, who’s single and whom you’re interested in. Now, we’re talking! You have a chance to score a romantic dinner here! The formula is very simple – wear a black leather jacket over a very white round-neck T-shirt and wear blue jeans and brown hiking boots. Don’t overdo the bling factor because you’ll look gay. No earrings, no rings on your fingers and most of all, no silver/gold watches that dangle!

Secondly, remember to compliment her every time you find something attractive.Be gentle and be nice .

Bus, train and chokri are precious! Respect them as your time factor. 

Walk real slow when you’re in their company and give them ample time to look at you and make their opinion. Even if you’re in a hurry, whenever you pass her seat, slow down and walk in real slow-motion. It helps. Do not bank on finding women in your new school or college or your new workplace. Go and hunt them out in all the places you never usually visit. The fact that you don’t visit these places and the fact that you’re single might give you a clue.

Bald men are considered hot by some women, so before you go shaving off your precious hair, try to get the girl to tell you if she likes bald men. Not all men look good without hair. Some men have an unnatural bulge in their faces, and if you remove your hair, you look like something the cat dragged in. Big turn-off, don’t do it!

The type of watch you wear plays a huge role in whether the girl accepts your offer of dinner. I suggest something black, not too flashy and something that doesn’t have hearts or bubbles on their faces. The hands of the watch must NOT by Mickey Mouse’s gloved hands!

Women like music, as a rule. Some like house/trace music and some of them prefer soft rock. Other freaky women prefer really really heavy/death metal music, and a few of these strange women will probably turn you into a druggie of you get too close. So, be careful and don’t get into any more trouble than you already are.

Asking a woman out on a date is quite a tricky situation and can lead to disastrous effects. From a simple “No” to spending a night in the city jail, anything could happen depending on how you ask them out. Some despo-self-help books will tell you that the direct approach is the best way, but take my word for it, it’s not! Asking her out has to be a long-drawn arduous process in which, her tastes and dislikes has to properly researched. Since this depends on individual women, I won’t say much on this, except that you should not go up to the girl and say, “Hi, Wanna eat?”

The choice of restaurant is also vital in building a fruitful relationship with the girl. Don’t take vegetarian girls to Barbeque Nation or KFC!!

Being funny is absolutely vital, but make sure people are laughing at your jokes and not at you. It’s easy to get confused. And if they’re laughing at you, then laugh with them and call yourself a moron, because some girls like that!

Be charming, be witty and be dumb. I know you’re probably very confused by now, but I can tell you that once you read this post again, you’ll feel really confident on approaching that girl of your dreams. Just don’t make it a nightmare.

Hope the force is with you ! May you be a martian guy and win a Venutian women:-)

THE NRIs .....

After travelling to most of the hot hubs for opportunity ..this is something I observed out of my sheer curiosity about Indians in foreign land.

Most of us including me ofcourse, NRIs, strive to blend in into their foreign society. It’s amusing to observe some of the measures we undertake:

We start rolling our “r”s. unfortunately we can never pronounce Rs like the natives do. So we end up sounding as if we had some vocal cord deformity.

Most us who never wore shorts in life start wearing shorts as soon as we enter the foreign land, choosing completely to ignore the visual abomination we perpetrate. Indians who venture into wearing shorts should take a look at themselves in the mirror. If ones legs look like bamboos with hair on them, one must avoid shorts at all costs.

Start following local sports such as football. Then we discuss these sports loudly with the localities at the water-cooler as if we have been watching these sports all our life

Try our hand at wit and make jokes when in a group. Humour is a very cultural thing. Unless practised with caution, it often ends up with a bunch of blank stares in one’s direction.

Start using profanity. We used to say “What the hell, yaar!” Now we say “What the fuck”. We think using the language employed by plumbers and construction workers takes us one step closer to being native!

Start drinking beer. Half my friends who drink beer never drank alcohol before. Now they drink beer to look cool at a party.

When a new comer to Germany says “First floor” to refer to second floor, that is, the one floor above ground floor, we act all confused and lost.

When at meetings, we put our feet up on the table/chair and we keep them there no matter who else in the cube/meeting room, just to prove to ourselves that we are cool.

Start pronouncing my name as Sand-iya.. rather Sandhya... or short it down to Sandieeee...!

“Most of us” does not mean “all of us.” Not all NRIs exhibit aforementioned symptoms and not all of them exhibit all the symptoms.

100th post :-) Thanking Ceremony

In all my 8 years of writing, never have I been so excited to celebrate a one-hundredth post of my blog. But Blogger’s Choice has become more than just a blog – it’s become a way of life. I hope I’ve upheld the quality of writing all through these months. There are a lot of people who are responsible for making this journey so overwhelmingly memorable. It started off as an experiment in open, creative writing, and soon became quite well-read.

I thank each and every one who indirectly has contributed to my blog.Of course my parents, sister, friends and crazy dreams.Above all, I really wanna thank those anonymous for your absolute support and mails.Sorry about not moderating few comments. Next time , try uncovering your identity. Cannot take the suspense anymore!

I’ve met some fascinating people through this space. Everyone who knows me personally, professionally and online, knows me a little better because of Blogger’s Choice. May be the sensitive part or the insane part.

Again, I declare that most of the characters in my blog are fictitious and written to expose the emotions. Not meant to hurt anyone personally. If it happened… Maaf kardo yaar!

Thanking all the initial readers of Blogger’s Choice, without whom, it wouldn’t have been possible to come this far.

Acknowledged all the major critics I’ve had on Blogger’s Choice and promise to keep the writing flowing eulogies to all you beautiful people on my blog roll.

It’s quite a nostalgic week ahead. I’m humbled. I guess I don’t really have many words to describe it

Now Blogger’s Choice is renamed as ENDLESS THOUGHTS.

Let me know if you want me to write something specific also .Sometimes emotions fall short to describe the beauty of the life.

Never thought I’d last this long!

Stats are also amazing …8K is not a bad score!

Special thanks to Vicky, Kumar, Kashyap, Raghav, Rahul, Siva, bojo and all the others who follow my blog regularly J

Another year will be over, another year will come. I hope and pray that the lights of Diwali illuminate the new chapter of our lives.

Happy Diwali!

Just for you !

You came into my life unexpectedly, like a firefly that suddenly flits into the darkness of the night and brightens it up.
And somewhere along the line, somewhere among the walks and the drives, the talks and the texts - you have become a part of me.

Then you walked away without a reason, miles apart and silence around with a piece of me !

strolling down the memory lane, I find myself all alone writhin in the excruciating pain
Probably I long for your presence again!!

PS: If that little bit of me is in you, do something to surprise me !

To the guy of my dreams .. still hesistating to come in front of me!

Words on a thread !

Just trying to make sense of this petty madness tied together with the flagrant hope of bringing out some amount of cohesion and comprehension; probably we all call it life. Funky shite, I tell you...

Major achievement, if you ask me... And this one's all about why I love living through this madness. Why I love trying to make sense and failing time and again and yet hopefully going for another try.

I love life because it’s beautiful. It’s got that poignant beauty of thinks that won’t last for long, like snowflakes and mayflies... Things that melt away or disappear, like a whiff of fancy!

 I love life because we alone can live ours. How much ever people try to take it away from us, we can still hold it within our little hands and hold it out to the sun. Warm it up a bit. Or hide it in our mitts when it gets cold and wintry.

I love life, most of all, because every moment in it is unique. Every moment you live belong to yourself 'cause you gave birth to it. And it would certainly not have existed without you, or outside of you. Life and all its moments stay with you and within you. Probably it’s the only thing that very truly belongs to you.

I love life because I can still feel, touch, hear, taste, see and live all that is around me.

I love life because I can smile, laugh, cry, hide my tears, and whisper my fears. Best part is I am never tired of it.

I love life because it holds a promise. A promise you can work out by yourself. A promise for the things around you!

I love life 'cause it has a past, a present and a future.

I love life because I try time and again to make sense outta it and never succeed.

So every once in a while, lean back. Take in a breath of air. Breathe in... Breathe out... Lick your lips and taste the air... It’s a beautiful world, and every inch and every moment of it belongs to you...

The Semi-Charmed kind of Life we lead... It’s funny... It’s sad... It’s happy... It’s mad... and above all its always worth living and loving...For all who made it this way, I enjoy it and appreciate it!

Nothing is worth losing, it is the art of living with fine mingling of holding on and letting go!

That's me :-)

Well … Someone asked me how I deal with people. I may not be perfect but I have a way in staying happy. I totally get the emotional outburst but the way you compose is the way you would want to live your life J

Stoicism is bliss when in yourself but unnervingly disconcerting when in others. It’s like speaking to a stone that points you reach when there is no way forward...no adjustment... you know just the right solution...but also the pointlessness in suggesting it!! Those are times when the opacity of the human soul makes you wonder...a fellow being...and yet so unlike...so indiscernible!!! So unobliging!! Unfeeling!

 You are at your wits end. The tremendousness is like a calamity and that conflicting indifference, the frustration and the inability to vent it out and of course, the consequentialness of your agony.Just the utter helplessness.

But I say -If only you could see the other side of the deal

If only you knew the joy therein!

The joy in not knowing...

Not understanding...

And not even bothering!

Or in forgetting for going

Even if not forgiving...

The convenience of it all

The wisdom it entails

The immense cocoon

The world is all blossoms!!

Life is good ! Make sure to enjoy it !

A Bit of Patriotism

People around me think Indians are either poor and complicated or dumb and weird.
Whatever we Indians are we are the best .
Poor ..hehahha.. Come, see our weddings !
Complicated.. Yes ! You need brains to understand us and our diversity :-)
Weird -Haan bhai ! Hum ko family matlab everyone we have known or acquainted with ...
We speak English in 28 ways !
We are best in Business, finance, Maths, philosophy ,medicine and of course corruption too.No country is blessed to have congress corruption roots strong !
Well In business , Bargaining power and ability is the highest with us .In fact it is in our blood.
Finance - Chindigiri karna koyi hum se seeke-Courtesy Marwadis, Gujjus and Tams.
Maths : Even rikshawala to PM of the country can do it for free! free! free!
Medicine : Come to Charminar ... Medicine is given for EVERYTHING

Over all ... This video below reminded me of INDIA , friends , education , culture and everything !
Have a look and feel proud to be an Indian :-)

A lot can happen over a coffee:P

Well….This is what we B School fresh-faces do in break. Either bird –watching or chic watching and then curse for being single. Being in a group of 14 boys, A and I never got a chance to feel that we are girls. Minimum we have 4-5 guys are around us at any given point of time (Exceptions are also there). Typically like the late 90’s Bollywood movies with college backdrop where hero with his 4-5 followers. As A is always travelling, probably it is only ME whom is mostly seen in the university.

Being with all this smart asses, I too picked up the guys’ lingo for gals.

Asset – A hot chic

Liability – Unwanted nerd in the group study

Insurer- Hooker

Customer engagement management- A pimp

Customer satisfaction – gal showing off skin

Price Management – A date within the budget and many more.

One day, probably my dress or the divine realisation within them made them think I am girl and needs attention too. As usual we found our way to fire place and started our usual talk. For the first time, a firang (Foreigner) entered our league. Guess y? Not for group study or assignment or anything related to acads.

This guy E walks up and calls me out to a side and asks me for a cup of coffee lake side.Before my green turned friends could say something , even I thought I need a break for these desi sophisticated chichoras.

Then E and I settled down on the bank of Rhien River and started talking about the last class we attended together. This Italian looked awesome. For the first time I noticed a guy in my class after 2 months of stay. I think Italians are quite explicit in expressing their feelings romantically about beauty and nature.

After a long poetic conversation, he finally asks me about myself. My likes and what as a friend I would share.

Finally feeling like a gal, I just started off on a very high note.

You see I am turning old

My memories are fading.

My hair is falling.

I worry about the size of my ass-its increasing with my age.

(He kept his decency in checking it out)

I talk too much.

I think too much.

I'm way too good for anyone else.

I put alarms to wake up at 3 am to listen to music when everything else is quiet.

Everything about 3 am is awesomely beautifully depressing.

I want my voice range to be 4 octaves. Sigh!

(I expected him to understand that I sing and ask me to sing for him)

I'm not fat-I'm just bombacious-vivacious-curvacious-ohmygodaciously generously layered with extra tissue.

So I have an ego problem.

Most guy friends I have fallen for me sometime or the other-I'm not sure if that’s good or bad.

I'm sick of being called cute. Where is that smart outgoing sexy image?

I like earthy people.

 I wanna sing great gig in the sky with a big bunch of friends in the dead of night on top of a hill,with a bonfire burning and screams and laughter echoing.

Detachment is my strength and my weakness.

I never get bored of myself.

I love planning surprises and making stuff for people.

I'm not a movie person. I haven’t seen tons of good movies. I’m too restless to sit thru a movie.

I don’t watch many sitcoms like most people like.

No, I am NOT a boring person!

I think I’m morphing into a guy. Thanks to that bunch of friends I have around.

I can’t live abroad without Indian food 

I hate tall buildings.

Neutral colours of things abroad put me off. Everything there is either grey black white or blue. Or grey again.

I'm either singing or extremely quiet when high.

I smell pages of books.

I can’t see myself 20 years from now Or even 10.

Or even 1 and half years from now.

(Thats cuz i dont have a time machine......)

I make really bad jokes sometimes.

Other times I’m just awesomely witty.

I've done the craziest things ever in the past 2 months.

Most of the mistakes I've made were worth making.

I've invented words and snigs -My best was this word "flouge" rhyming with rouge...which means Trouble.

I love my friends...each n every one of them. So much...

I laugh a lot.

I like bright things.

I rarely regret things even if I do something wrong on an impulse.

I regret breaking someone's heart.

I contradict myself.

I have a very very very bad temper which I struggle to keep under control.

I suffer from foot in mouth syndrome.

I used to go the library 3rd floor just to watch the trains pass by. Also used to count how many boogies goods trains have.

I listen to JLo and the Pussycat Dolls sometimes.

There's nothing like walking on the bunds thru paddy fields.

There's nothing like a rooftop parrdyyy with gooood moosik.

I try to be as non-judgemental as possible.

I drool if I sleep flat.

I'm generally stable n steady.

I'm gonna experience everything in life.

I'm crazy about philosophy.

I hate preachy books.

I have loose hinges-I move my hands n head a lot while speaking.

I discover new awesomeness about myself every day.

Smoke rings fascinate me but I hate smokers

I judge how fat I am by examining how many veins show at the back of my hand.

I have to ride a water bike, water ski and see Mt. Everest before I die.

I sometimes long for shoes with lights.

I'm known for being clumsy and hurting myself every time.

I can’t lead a slow life-I need to be busy, I need a dynamic fast paced life.

I can’t follow a routine- I get bored of things easily.

I'm good with people.

I'm crazy about business.

I need to figure out how to get rich soon.

I'm getting nowhere.

I'm quite satisfied with my 23 years of life. Phew!

Can you imagine I just spoke this out in one go?

Poor guy was dumb stuck and took 5 minutes to regain himself.

Then we walked back to the place where my friends were waiting.

My friends pounced upon me for details. Worth a karva chaut or not !

After that day, E just smiles at me and drops me an email but never dared to talk to me again except hi! This is what happened with couple of other boys after E:-P

The Fickle world !

He came from nowhere and didn’t know where he was heading. He seemed lost, confused, like a paper boat caught in a hurricane, with turmoil eroding the last traces of sanity. He was escaping, hoping for a better tomorrow, but he didn’t know for sure. Unsure is sure quality of his insanity. He wanted a fresh start, desperately. He didn’t know how he was going to achieve it. He caught himself searching for something that needs acceptance than arrogance.

He vowed to find a muse, an inspiration, a candle in the whirlwind of his bad luck. He wanted to find the elusive abundance of good luck that had deserted him for so long. He yearned for the peace and tranquillity that had been hiding from him. It was not a search in vain; a search of a fairy.

Then he met her and they regarded each other cautiously, unsure of just how much attention the other person warranted. She seemed harmless enough, but he was expecting his seemingly unlimited quota of bad luck to step in again.

They went on to talk about other things mundane. Time flew by and a pact was etched in stone between them, unwritten yet indelible. It took time, obviously. It did not happen overnight. He began to experience her presence more and more in his life until it almost became an addiction. Over time, he started craving for her company. She became the beacon of light in the darkness that had clouded him. She forced him to embrace good luck again, though he never knew how she managed to do that.

He still had no destination in mind, but he knew that his journey wouldn’t be lonely any more; the journey that he had started from nowhere and had seemed to head nowhere yet she  made it more bearable. He had a lot of things to be thankful for. And for a million things more.

He had found his muse. He had found his share of good fortune but never accepted it. Again, he pondered on his destination. He got back to nowhere. Was it hard to use the beacon light for him?  He lost the fairy and the good fortune and certainly enough that he would not know what he lost also. His bad influence and his confusion could not realise the fairy is for his rescue.

Probably it is the pun of the mind that it can be a servant of false illusions but not the master of tough reality. Hence, the present of life is lost , so is the purpose of living ! 

Once you accept your limits, then you go ahead ~ Albert Einstein 

Dedicated to all the fools who feel women are the disturbing elements of life!

"Sick-Fun"

Spring is in the air!  It is time for nasty allergies and unpleasant flu.  You may probably call in sick one time or the other.  But did you and your boyfriend both fall sick and took the day off at the same time?  If you didn’t, let me tell ya, this situation provides numerous unexplored romantic opportunities.  Just because you both are sick like dogs, clinging to bed with aching body, bouts of cough, pounding headache and high fever, it doesn’t mean you can’t make it romantic and fun.

Here are the top ten things to do to spice up your sick day when you and your spouse both are home sick:

10. Impersonate movie actors in your soar-throat aided husky voice

9. Play thermometer race.  Stick digital thermometers in your mouths and see whose beeps first

8. Just in case there is ever such event, practice for Olympic Synchronized Coughing

7. Sit out in the backyard and chat over a hot cup of Theraflu

6. Forget staring contest.  Try “who can go longest without wiping nose” contest

5. You played drinking games, didn’t you?  Try this: watch daytime tabloid talk shows and take a cough syrup shot every time a word is bleeped out

4. If your noses are completely blocked, see how long you can kiss before you gasp for air.  Can you hit the magic 1 minute mark?

3. Hide a Tylenol capsule in your layers of clothing and let him/her search for it

2. One word.  69!  Give each other foot-massages

1. To declare your undying love for each other, exchange your nasal sprays

Okie …Well this is what I get to see all day by my roomies and I sit there like a frozen Eskimo!

sources: Twisted DNA

Fraaandship &&^*(*?

I'm sure most of you have had this experience before. There’s this freaky gal whom I have had the misfortune of having a friendship with. According to her, we’re the “best-est of friends” and according to me, she’s an unwanted piece of garbage who just doesn't know when she’s not needed and just doesn't understand the fact that she’s a burden on this earth! I pity her. If you look at her face, the word “dumb” pops in your mind. Her body fat is unevenly distributed, her eyes are lop-sided, her brain is in the wrong place, and she would be automatically entered into the mentally-challenged Olympics if she went anywhere near the venue! If she wasn't dropped on her head as a child, I seriously wonder what sort of parenting she had to go through to turn out as she has.

I may be a bit too harsh on her, but that’s the way she is. I can’t help it. She can do anything to be in someone’s good books but unfortunately she doesn’t know that it purely reflects her dumbness. Would you believe that I’m actually down-playing this mentally-challenged embarrassment to nature who thinks I am her friend?

Anyway, I had lent this gal 8 euros, a small amount considering the amount of money I get. This was over a month ago. She promptly forgot about it until I gently reminded her that she owes me. She immediately made out a promise note for 8 bucks and gave it to me. Now, this was the first time I was handling a promise note and I was like, “Baby, it’s ok! You can give me the cash when you have it. No hurry!”

So, she said, “No honey, take it. I don’t want to keep you waiting!” I was surprised but hey, money’s money. So, I took it and waited for a week.Oh wait , please do not confuse with the original promise note. 

Her promise note was like this :

" Hey Buddy,

Despite your money constraint you lent me money for filling my stomach with a meal. I am grateful. It's time to give it back but unfortunately my card pin is missing and would get one tomorrow. I will draw and give it to you. Till then keep my 500 rupees note with you . Kill me if I am not giving you .

Love you !

XXXXX"

Finally, she told me to come near some godforsaken building on some highway to collect the money.  I was a bit scared and was wondering if she was going to kill me in that secluded place and make it look like an accident or something. I had no idea how her under-developed mind worked. Her single knock can make me handicapped for life time. She finally showed up after making me wait an hour and handed the money over to me. I asked her why she called me so far away from civilization. Instead of replying, he put his hand inside her pocket and the gesture made me freak out. I was about to shout bloody murder, when she took out her mobile and said, “Come here”. That even freaked me out. I was wondering a stick body like mine do not need any fucking other souls to kill , her elephant body is enough.

Then entered a tiny creature who must be a cross breed of squirrel and monkey. And she introduces him to be my potential boyfriend. But from which angle? He talks as if he is sentenced to death the next second asking for all lame desires of his life.

I walked with those demented freaks to a coffee to fulfil the loser’s long lasting desire and went home, where my roomies had something even crazier with this retard.

Real Beauty!

The blue sky, the steep mountains, and the vast greeneries, the chilling cold never misses to say “Halooo” every morning! This journey of 20 minutes to station everyday reminds me of the epics I had. As I climb up that mountain, it reminds of magical uncertain journey of life where I lived, survived, felt true love, made lifelong friends, stood on podiums claiming the records. It also reminds of the dark mistakes, lost good friends, let people down, and lost good jobs. This bright morning makes me find the real beauty of the life, Pats on my back and says,” Bring it on, my lady .Experience is a good teacher”. A voyage all my own.

Transformation rarely announces itself with trumpets. It usually happens gradually, over time, and then -- clang! -- A singular moment chimes. These days I started living with the REAL facts.

Beauty is never in the people, it is in the eyes of the withholder.  No wonder, I really could take it when a guy told me I am fat, unattractive and boring.

I always waited for a day where someone would walk into my life and make me realise that the world has just two souls- He and I. But matter of fact is no person can totally complement each other as to sweep off the world to make it a fanatic dream for you!  Ultimately when you give something, you don’t get back the same...may be measured in expectations or in truth. Where giving-taking is involved...there is no balanced strike.

Well… bottom line is Loneliness in these silent husky breezes along the woods at a pleasant sun rise is the best thing that can happen to someone… 

Destination Deutschland !

August, 2012

That was the last week in India. I was kind of running around for visa, last minute shopping and loads of farewells. People are getting little emotional while few people are envying. Not to say that I was little discontent leaving the comfort zone yet I have a profound dream and clear ambition in life. I guess this is one big chance to prove my stance and my talent.Probably a pass for new life too.

After a heavy emotional farewell, I was finally aboard. It felt so rosy and so peaceful. Serene it was. I was just that utter magical silence. No love. No hard friendships. No hauntings and no spying. Just no relations. This time I could feel old me and purest form of me. Heart clearly instructing on the ambition and mind totally focused. 8 hours of journey also did not tire me. Probably at that time I haven’t had any idea what is ahead me in few hours.

Dutcheland : Land of beauty and city of my dreams, Could not think anything except jaw-dropping at the sky scrapers.  They looked promised too in hiring me in  few months. Well.. That was not a hell lot of a dream but I wish it is the nearest reality. 

Single girl...60 kgs luggage... new city and the language as the main barrier; took an elaborate 3 hours to find my house and settle.

Then the reality struck. Dreams lightly got shaded and needs are craving to be fulfilled. After a 5 days of not so easy struggle, finally found an Indian couple on one of the shuttling trains I take to university who readily help me with rest of things.

Day one in the university: 200+ students … average GMAT score 670... Students from 57 different nations on a single platform and realising how special we are to be admitted – just an awesome feeling. Coping up with the best has now become one of the KRA’s as my track record helped me waive off my masters Prep semester (A semester which has to be taken by people with GMAT below the average and also for students with non-business background). I guess my stars are really bright and I was one of those 3 students who won the scholarship for the semester.

After a series of episodes, I finally managed to settle great with all formalities in place. Excellent infrastructure and superb global exposure and most importantly a great place to be. 

Sessions began and I get to know few Indians are around the campus and I hurried to catch up with them and I get to know everyone lives in my student hostel only … And amazing part is they r the students of IIM –A, B, C . Few students from NUS and AIM . I could feel the pride running in my limbs saying that I share a classroom with the best Indian managers.

This is a place where you are valued special for what you are ; probably more than  the dad’s princess and the king’s queen. Over all… I am loving it… nice people, new life and new stories and new world.

“It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be.”

Probably one of the best places where you can see the sun set and fog fall on the river Rhine and a clear peace of no guilt living! I miss no one and I wish to have not many too. 

Await the next post.. Am on a roll to tour around the Europe :D

When heart breaks...then everything sounds mystery

It was difficult at least for me to be calm. Silence within was echoing. For some reason I didn't know what to say; all I could say to have a composed conversation,” I need to call you back “.

Silence conquered!!! Damn silence.

I learnt “actions speak louder than words”. And now I totally understood the essence of it. To my surprise, the reason for that utter silence or put it as the choked conversation; was reflected so clearly.

Yet again, I got that crystal clear… with another profound experience. Words are yet to fade….Some actions always reflect your priorities.

No matter what beautiful phrases or adjectives are used, if you genuinely want to make someone special just make some time for them!!

Slowly I realized that I was distracted from the reality. I couldn't bare the reality -I guess I was slowly - well very slowly accepting it.

Life has come easily to me allowing me to live simply and forget that there are people out there who can be no dears but just mere pretenders. I try to believe that each person in my life is a kind, gentle-hearted but donno why … every time I tend to trust it, my life comes up an experience that proves wrong and once again reality prevails. Probably by now even this little heart started accepting that it is no dear for anyone… no one needs it … no one wants it as a priority but it is just an option  …  no one understands it ….

Well, even I understood that to have me it needs true interest or that excitement I have it for them… But sometimes can’t blame the situations but not the situations created by sluggishness.

So bottom line is … In fact my so called dear people don’t deserve that piece of  me I give them as a special place in my heart ..So lemme keep this drama on with the mere mutuality!

Mistakes cost so heavy when emotions are involved and they merely tear off the hearts for life time! Don't worry... even my hurt heart can honor as before...  

My weak black and whites

I've been utterly tired the last few days to even think of making my little fingers work a tiny ounce to come up with a post....it's called being busy. Although it’s time to take a break but my new discoveries took me back remembering the times I pondered - thought about it.

I am sure everyone has had this moment in life. The ‘so near, yet so far’ one. As the old statement goes, ‘life’s uncertainties are indeed baffling, but that’s what life is all about.’ However, something that’s more annoying than the uncertainty is the fact that they are mostly controlled by others, and we are left with no choice. Say it in the case of the chocolate in the refrigerator to the marriage. The only respite in this: I am not alone...I had something with me and within me that can never be dodged.

It’s the void. It is that difficult situation where I sit there in silence. Silence that is even louder to be deafening....for some reason I do not have a say; but suddenly i tried to utter a few measly words and it stopped at the tip of my tongue. Damn silence. Slowly I recognized that I had to clear my thought cobwebs that distract me. I wanted everything to vanish and to stop in mid-air so i could stay in the world where the black and the white has no discrimination.

I own the me with all the abnormalities ! 

Some aspects come as pause in this not-so-happy experience which is definitely worth reliving. Remember those childhood days when all it took to cheer you up was a long drive in Appa's car or a cycle ride along an unexplored path? The weak hearted me had one of those days today.

Heart-Heat-hot!

Your whole world lies within you. The outer world is the manifestation of what is going on inside. The Power lies within you. Don’t think what others do, act & say, always travel on your desired path with your beliefs, loving & kindness to everyone coming on your way. Be happy for small things which will someday turn into bigger one. Have Patience & say to yourself something good going to happen today

Years of life in that city also never made me this twitchy as it is making me now. Feels like a haunted spoof. Well… I believed this is a day even the “I” was conquered by the desire. Yes, the ego in me also got in terms with the desire. 1000 feelings of this little churning heart, twirling around the mind probably struck harder than the labor pain and soother than the morning breeze. Hanging between the both, it needed just a patient calm heart to strike the equilibrium. Then I closed my eyes and imagined that situation how it would be, seen the world it would be, visualized the desire I want it to be and seized those thoughts as belief and was set to get sunk in those positive waves.

Breaking those age old contemplations was not easy, cracking those mental precincts was not easy and crossing those boundaries of distance is not easy yet the minute faith in today is tomorrow’s treasure. Well…thinking of tomorrow is again a long process while living the moment of the day as the last moment of the life is what was clinching.

Then comes the wisdom of life with different kinds of games .If you don’t play any, you won’t be able to understand the game. Only if you play well, you can jump to the next level. Without facing the music, you wouldn’t learn the dance and without taking risks, life wouldn’t be same as it ought to be.

So with a big risk of life, with a heart full of desire and mind full of confidence and with an attitude of “Just live today”, I pack my bags to that city which gave my LOVE a shelter and my dream a chance to live. It is just another travel but a very memorable travel! Unexpected is the expected flavor of every journey J

PS:  Actually no. The post wasn’t about you. But hey, if the shoes fit in right, wear it:-P

The Normal Theory !

When I say normal theory I mean that’s exactly what it’s not because the theory talks about how nothing is normal which includes this theory obviously.

Fine so here goes…

What is normal...?

Something that is common to everyone... but by default no two individuals are the same, so there is no question of there being features common to all people, or even most of the people. Even if for a moment you assume that there is a feature ‘x’ which one person has, and define that as normal; in that case, as one may notice, that feature will not be present in the same way in almost any other individual, because every individual is unique in his or her own way. So in that case everyone else will be classified as abnormal and that in fact will become the common feature in all people. So abnormality is the only thing that is normal and hence there is no normal except abnormal in itself.

Now you may choose to look at it in a more simplified, absolute, and practical manner.

What is normal mathematically?

A line that is perpendicular to a given line, or a line that lies at an angle that is not inclined to any side. By that definition, a normal person will be one who is not inclined to any side in any sense. Now a 'normal' person will have no inclinations whatsoever and that is an impossibility because there are many things a person will be inclined to.Could be something as lame as “Do I like ice cream or not?". I am not normal so I can say I like ice cream but a 'normal' person cannot say that he likes or that he dislikes it has to be in the middle. Now in such simple cases, one might find exceptions. For example, take me and chocolate.. I don’t particularly like chocolate, but I don’t dislike it either.

But looking into more serious issues like life, it is impossibility for one to be normal, as the opposite of life is afterlife (not death). Now I have never met a person who is not alive and not in his afterlife (if an afterlife exists). Or for purposes of simplification a normal person cannot not be alive and or not be dead at the same time as that is a practical impossibility.

To look at it another way, people are said to be normal if their behaviour conforms to the standard behaviour set in society and in life. Therefore to be “normal” is to act parallel to everyone else. But now, blatantly using semantics, normal means perpendicular. Therefore to act normal is to act at an absolute tangent to everyone else’s behaviour, which is abnormal… Therefore, normal is abnormal… If that’s too mind boggling for you, take it that normal does not exist...

So what have we learnt??

Normal= 90 degrees

or,

Normal= 0 degrees

or,

Normal= Abnormal

or,

Normal= nil.

Take your pick…

The Most UN(answered) Questions Of The World!

I have been wondering if I can ever get answers for these...then I found the genius K who can answer my every question. My instant reaction would be (* wooooowww* u r suchaaaa Einstein* muaaahhhh … U r just the light in my life…) probably that might be in a hypothetical situation .

Well, certainly reality is * bang-my-head * expression and *kill me * expression.

OK! Here are few such questions and genius answers. ** Evil Smirk** uahhahahhaha!

Q. Are unripe oranges called greens?

A.  They are called yellow and ripen one is called red. (Shades of colors)

Yeah! I totally got you: P… Aage bado

Q. Can it be a mistake that "desserts" gives "stressed" spelled backwards?

A. No, it’s happy coincidence just like having you for a coffee.

Oh..For coffee episode...u need to talk to K …he would explain it better:- D.. Specially the CCD one: -P or drop me a mail…

Q. Crime doesn't pay . . . does that mean that my job is a crime?

A. Probably it is not under law, which is why it broke the equality.

(Everyone is equal in eyes of law is meant! Ok…I got your * kill me * expression)

Q. Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?

A. Such an unexpected way of expecting answer.

Q. Do fish get thirsty?

A. No because they are not followers of Morarji Desai Urine Therapy.

Q. Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

A. They don’t bother, the just drink the served soup.

Q. Do penguins have knees?

A. They don’t need to have because they are not going to get wedded in Indian tradition where you fall on knees for everything.

 Yaaayyyyy ! Join the club of insanity... Imagine my plight, he is my boy friend!

Q. Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

A. Yeah, just after I fell in love with you.

*Rolling eyes*

Q. How do you get off a non-stop flight?

A. When “Nan” (Tamil) tells to stop.

Q. If mummies are from Egypt, then from where are daddies from?

A. From bio shock series  

* Do-u –mind –stuffing –ur –geekness –below –the belt* expression

Q. If a brown cow eats green grass why is it's milk white?

A. Because it shits black.

*U r SICK* U need help !

Q. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

A. On their Seats (buttocks)

Q. If a man with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, would it be considered a hostage situation?

A. Should wait till his personality splits in a cop.

Q. If beef comes from a cow and ham from a pig, why do they put beef in hamburgers?

A. To sell it in Hamburg (forget not the grin he gave after the answer)

Q. If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?

A. They are also in shape. RoundJ

Q. If there's so much laborsaving machinery, why don't I have more free time?

A. Employee Engagement

Q. If you're going at the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

A. Question invalid if I am on harry potter’s broomstick.

* Utter Maniacness *

Q. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

A. Probably that is why I was spared by my last date.

Q. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges?

A. Easy! Suck out the water along with the sponges and release them to measure.

Q. What do you do when you discover an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?

A. I will try not endangering me.

* Fu***ing! What’s the logic??*

Q. Where does the white go when the snow melts?

A. To the Snow White

Q. Why call it a building if it's already been built?

A. Because they don’t know tenses.

 * Kill me * expression 

Q. Why does night fall but never break and day break but never fall?

A. Day has a heart. It loves moons. Hearing this night trips and falls since it is dark.

Q. Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

A. To show that the one who puts it on is not dumb

* Lamest of the all *

Q. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

A. Watch Rush hour series to get some light

Q. Name a fly without wings?

A. Walk

Q. Do you love me because I am beautiful or I am beautiful because you love me?

A. Absurd question because neither of the things are true.

 *aarrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*

Well...that is it about my genius counterpart: D ..the so called Agastya of contemporary world. 

I understand your excitement in meeting him … Sure! Why not: D . The day is not very far!