Killer English, Awesome Reporter and Pagalpanti

I will now stop writing about the wedding seasons and get-togethers. I've been trying very hard to be funny and witty and engaging all the time and now it's all gone. I'm burnt out. Even I don't find what I have to say remotely interesting anymore. This is why I have retired from facebook.

So I decided enough of these contrived jokes and enough attention seeking, allow me to be that grey spinster lady who only talks about her cat.

Ok ignore all the crap … Am back again with another post.

One unusual day, heavy down pour and loads of gossip with masala pakodas on the side. While we are cherishing our good old school days, B and P went really wild and uncontrollable although they were not sloshed. This went to an extent that my neighbors came up to my door to enquire if everything is alright. Well, the whole sole drama was P, who hardly knew Shakespeare’s spelling while in school and today an official reporter of THE HINDU. Mind you, she is a special correspondent i.e the EDITOR role. Here is her ultimate hold on English.

1. What is your thinking language?

Well, she meant in which language your mind responds first.

2. Rain is falling

3. Fun happened in her birthday party, no!

4. We removed pictures

5. Fun came, no?

6. His cycle went to chori

7. Don’t speak in front of my back!

8. At this point in time

Congratulations P for making there … God save THE HINDU! No wonder he has sent me there as a savior: P

Ciao….

Pagalpanti bhi zaroori hai yaar....

How tough is the tough ?

Dedicated to all the tough nuts !

The toughest thing in the world to stand
Is to watch a friend part away
And be handcuffed to it.

The toughest thing in the world to wish for
Is a need to talk to make things all right
But knowing that anything you say is going to sound all wrong.

The toughest thing in the world to hope for
Is expecting to be loved back with same intensity
When you know the source is bleak and long dead.

The toughest thing in the world to understand
Is why truth tears the heart and soul
And the pain still feels raw each time it is thought of.

The toughest truth in the world to accept
Is knowledge that nothing lasts forever
But to continue life, pretending it does.

Credits to Preeti who to shared it :-)

Chaotic Silence

Lost in deep life in hurt of pain and sadness,
grudges and finally guilt
As every day I have played this game,
trying to act as if it doesn't hurt,
I sit there to realize where lies will, hope and forgiveness
that is surely bliss of love with truth of care

But for those things are now of hope alone
and no truth in them exists
for sorrow and sham
adorning that fate as the longing love

Then his wandering admiring eyes met mine
as though to touch and feel
the warmth that amiss
and the hurt that was now real
pledging agony shall not see,
that light in his eyes will last
for seemed destined that he want to be
a soul of the cast

That moment seemed to flow like a molten sapphire
and there’s deep blue silence,
It's only me, my breath and my heartbeat
It all made me believe in my existence
 but should I own the shun to retain me ?

'TIDE' Zindagi

Have you ever tried remaining in one bedroom for one solid month with one introverted special joy trip to the living room? Have you? No, not in the fun way …Yeah, but I did for some undiagnosed disease and the quirk of fate is am considered normal after 20 loose motions and 10 vomiting per day.

All I was blessed in my room is a jhinchaak green and yellow coloured bedsheet on my bed with over-happy flowers on it. Very nice and jarring. But I might have cabin fever. So everything is appearing a dull uniform shade of taupe. The flowers are turning into little doodle and intermingling. Can anyone think of it as sexual reproduction?
Rest of the room details chahiye ? chal … itna mein itnaich milenga …
No one understands this dulling of color business. It's as though I was in a Tide safedi ad and I'm that idiot who doesn't use Tide soap and the visitors are like Love life lackluster, Dorling? Have no fear, I shall be your Tide soap and with that close up smile.

Any homo sapien who entered my room, I felt as if  they are from some kind of EKTA’s serial with over color on their face and excessively display of affection.

I ate cloromint aur meri dhimak ki batti chali…So to make my TIDE zindagi here I auction my script as the best soap of the century – Ekta are you game?

(Happiness)

Mom comes to see me. I was presented a freshly made sandwich with couple .

"Mmm", I thought, "What a delight. Let me bite into this with great pomp and splendor."

And I did just that.

(Drama)

Just then, a hot tomato peel unwound itself from a tomato slice and landed squarely on my bottom lip. It was very very hot. Jump up and down and shake head to dislodge it kind of hot. Mom...betaaaaaa.... sambalke...

(Suspense)

But, unknown to me, this tomato peel was from a tomato slice that was from a tomato that was from a tomato plant that had grown from a tomato seed that had been sat on by a leech just after being sown. This soon became increasingly apparent since the tomato peel was exhibiting astonishingly leech-like abilities.

(Tragedy)

After all these shenanigans, my lip was purple and swollen.

Mom: Awwwww....meri bachi....

(Bittersweet ending)

It is a day later and my lip has now healed. It is now, however, unnaturally flat.

(Conclusion)

I should get around to write my acceptance speech for the award for Most Ridiculous Accident Ever.