Things change huh ... it goes in a circle ...

It’s already a year past? Oh my freaking mad… I just did not realize the way it went in this chaos. For mushy person like me it took me a year to be anti-mush. “I want to get rid of nostalgia, me and my freakishly good memory for the mundane. Non sentimentality is my goal and needless to say, I’m not prosaic anymore”. That’s all the mind started screaming loud as a loud beep interrupted it by a text message at 11.55 PM. “Happy Birthdayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Yay! “My eyes almost popped out as it was unexpected. Although I replied “tq” But my mind cribbed..Kanjoos –Maakichoos…. Phone kar sakta hai Na…Saala ...”I love u “bolne ke liye 1000 times’ kareya ...Ek no suna...bas...katam... Wtf … Why don’t people get to normal!

12 -3 PM calls were lined up to wish me. Probably that is the only day I was made princess of this paradise in this strange world. Everyone showers the utterly love on you. Also it is the only chance to live the fullest of bitterness in the name of birthday “bombs-bums”. Ouch …u don’t ask me about it… 2 days passed and I still can’t still properly on my own bum. I was bashed to brim of everyone’s grudge .Irony is that comes with a smile and should be taken with smile only.

Oh good… K didn’t call me at 12 ….his call would be on priority for me than anyone’s. Again that would be a cribbing point. Loads of flowers …lots of noise….I always enjoyed it being the birthday person …say it mine or someone else’s .Face book , mobile , mails ..All flooded with wishes...Love and nostalgic photographs… but I waited my whole day for only phone call. Just a call... only that heart knows how much I waited for it and of course K knew it too. Finally I got it as the way it comes every year!

Of course it concerns me when an aged old friend of mine don’t wish me …it hurts when my boy friend is not next to me... it frets when people walk away from my life impertinently. But K only consoles me saying …don’t expect...just respect and go with the flow. Had he not been correct, I would not have enjoyed his 12 ‘0 clock surprise … or a mail that made me smile from a parted friend of mine ...” No one can be mad at oneself and others forever… Happy Birthday “

But still small things did hassle me …like the girl next to me...who is suppose to be good of friends at work place actually did not wish me. Also the friend who is the first one to call every year on my birthday wished me on Face book. Well, it is petty if you don’t expect...but can someone stop expecting???

I really don’t have to be that dejected too as I already have more that is troubling…where the most caring friend of mine who never leaves an opportunity to make me special ,left me back as his expectation is something more from this relation. Another one comes up with a proposal when I not ready for any commitment. Another one breaks up cuz her crush loves me. The best was the guy who pushed me to wall to like him and backs off when things are falling in trail. A hard lesson that I have learnt yet again…I always knew...But ignored to adapt … Expectation – The Virus of Unhappiness!

Had I not expected what you have given then I wouldn't have been nostalgic to the point of swooning, romantic to the point of being slapped by people and verbose to the extent of getting a parched throat. Yes, I expected and now being the memory that would put even a goldfish to shame. And now things changed and as for me… I am... sand in the wind- Sandieeeee, a new life unfolds - this is for all of you, a part of my world, then and now, thank you for the wishes.

Ok in short .. my Birthday went off in the dilemma of expectation and re-framing me ... 

Mera beta engineer banega!!!

Yesterday I went to see my cousin who delivered a baby boy. He was cho cute to hold, the tiny tender tot, velvety soft and amazingly bright. All I could think of is he is just so adorable as my cute soft toy but Dadaji comes in to hold the lil one ..and shouts .. awww kuchu kuchu … tere papa ki tarah Engineer banna beta! Before the baby is named, the career is obviously decided. Well, this is something I really fail to understand old folks in planning our career when we are in our diapers only. I guess it's that age-old stigma we Indians just cannot seem to shrug off for the eternal question in the middle class mind …Doctor or Engineer?...which gets more specific...computers or biotech?....even more specific...JAVA course or GRE? And the questions just keep coming!!!

Even though there are tremendous academic, peer and social pressures on today's youth and children in a country like India, there is no denying the fact that we appear to somehow, rather sheepishly, fall prey to the general herd mentality all around us and often get flown along the strongest drift of the times! The Indian rational tradition of thinking and decision (which we, at other times, pride ourselves on) conveniently gives way to a false and hypocritical sense of future security and moral righteousness! The result? A lot of good artists, musicians, historians, poets, archaeologists and sportsmen turn up carrying T-scales and the obnoxious label of "engineering student", under the overwhelming umbrella of social respectability and class.

We keep hearing about the pathetic fates met by those few rebels among our friends and cousins, who chose to follow their passion and in the process lost out on the "race of life"! Society treats them like outlaws, as if engineering is the only divine profession worth living in.Well actually, there are a few laws driving today's engineers, not found in the numerous career counseling guide books....and who know them better than the unfortunate few, who really wanted to be an engineer and almost ended up a cynical something!

Law 1: Right to JEE (Joint Entrance Examination, the premier engineering entrance exam in India) is a birth-right, and every student shall have to take it, even if they prefer facing the firing squad to a math’s paper!
Law 2: All important and high-scoring subjects need to be captured in notes......not the other way round.....and during exams? Well, careful strategy...after all: "Hum aam mein sab nange hai!" (Among us we are all the same)
Law 3: If you are not exceptionally intelligent and a touch lucky, you will not get to work in your dream job after college...and that is not such a bad thing, is it?
Law 4: After 2 years of work, you will feel like moving on to either an MBA or a masters, without which they say you are doomed...."but hey, 2 more years’ man...and then sky is the limit!"...career counseling nowadays is almost like marketing to you your own future!
Law 5: Almost every so-called "engineering job", no matter what your pay-scale is, gets intolerable after the first year...worst kept secret...but your "pseudo-engineer ego" is never supposed to give way - especially in front of the "Arts" guys!
Law 6: You feel like having a silent laugh to yourself when they call you "the IT guy" for doing the "Ctrl C Ctrl V" routine day in and day out....but then again, who cares?
Law 7: Before facing the job interview in final year, you never quite realized how important a trivial thing like communication could be! if only you spared a few hours for the "lowly language subjects" from your JEE preparation that crucial year!

But even with laws and the divine hand of society guiding us engineers, we often stop to ask ourselves......What am I doing? Is this worth it? What if....? But then again, in comes the "herd", pushing and tossing us about.......till we give way and become a part of the crowd! We are engineers, after all... Each indecision brings its own delays and days are lost lamenting over lost days... What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness have magic, power, and genius in it. Just be what you want ...
Not that second minute of your Life says

Arey yaar ..experience se bolri hoon !

Are you Sure about the problem ?

Problem - Solution
Are you sure about them?

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops - a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight,built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, "Big John doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back.

Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened - Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the next.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff.

By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself. So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, "Big John doesn't pay!"


The driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, "And why not? "

With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, "Big John has a bus pass ."

Management Lesson: "Be sure there is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one."

Found it in my random browsing.. I liked it..hope u like it too :D

In a village ...

At 5:30am the prayer call came through my hut’s thatch roof. This call was blasted through a megaphone attached to the roof of the large temple in the center of the village. Other prayer call recordings soon erupt from the smaller temples, creating a cacophony that echoes over the village. It is a strangely soothing sound. This is how my day zero started at a village named Vijayawada in Andhra Pradesh on the day of Makar Sankranthi, a festival of kites.
It is a traditional seaside village which has managed to retain a lot of its charm and character. There is plenty to see and adore. Well, now it’s no more a village yet the life is still so simple there.

The bamboo bed frame creaks as I sit up. I hear the sharp “to trick or to treat” calls of the grey Bulbuls in a tree outside, roosters crowing, donkeys braying, children crying, and goats wailing. The first wife in the family I lived with is already up and using a mortar and pestle to pound coos to make porridge for breakfast. I un-tucked my mosquito net and flip it up over the plastic tarp that I have tied above it to protect my bed from the dust that falls from the thatch roof. I go into my back yard to the pit latrine. The sun has not yet risen, but there is just enough light to see by. A smell of smoke fills the air, coming from the cooking fire in my host-family’s cooking-hut. I dress and walk out of my front door to greet whoever else is around. Greeting people is an important thing to do in village life. I could see the host has planned a bonfire there called Bhogi Manta..Woow.. That’s all I needed to beat the cold there.

Here comes the amazing part, to find a place to attend the nature calls...I crossed the compound (a ring of thatch roof huts connected by a straw fence and concrete wall) and walked around the cooking hut to where the garden is. There is a five square meter space surrounded on three sides by chicken wire nailed to several posts dug into the ground. The fourth side consists of the concrete wall that runs along one side of my compound. Buckets of water in a large, blue, plastic waste bin were kept in one corner of the garden. An old plastic chocolate spread container with holes punched into it served as my watering can. Now don’t ask me details about the water can used for the loosing purpose.

I close and tie shut the gates, then check the fence to ensure that the various goats, donkeys, and sheep that roam the village cannot break in. Chickens, however, were unavoidable pests. They frequently flew over the inappropriately named “chicken wire” and scratched up the fertilizer. Well… I don’t wanna elaborate more ..:-P

During the day time, yet misty but a slight pinch of the rising sun ..Beautiful is the sight along the Ghats of the River Krishna. I could see quite a lot of buffalos bathing and of course some natives doing their household activities there. And amazing were the kids flying kites along the river side…I remember those days when we used to bunk school for flying kites. . Running on the roads, climbing trees, jumping rooftops. But being here is different...It’s more of pet puja than some activity. It’s more like crazily honored by every person there with Drinks, sweets, snacks, and loads of food.
Amusing part of this festival is people get dressed up too good in the traditional wear and spread rangolis in front of their houses. And it is also untold competition amongst the neighbors who spread it best . Along with it , the put heaps of cow dung called as Gobbillu ..Then comes the Haridasu with nandi as a part of tradition.People here leave no option of decorating their houses as if it is a traditional wedding. Its just so fantastic to be around .. say it that delicate flower fragrance or the soft human relations ..its the best :D

Kids here don care anything.. Let it rain; let it shine...it never bothered. And yeah music is the best. Well that was the best of folk you get to hear and sing in this festival. By the end of the day they had sore throats, manja cuts, dry skin, life time guarantee of tan, and a lot of smiles.

Irony about flying kites in Hyderabad last year was, when we all (friends) went to the terrace of my house and tried to fly a kite but all thanks to the apartments around .Every kite I tried to fly was eventually stuck to some wire or to the clothes hanging in someone’s balcony. After 1 hour of trying, I thought "fck this" and we went online, logged on to www.miniclip.com and played Kite Flying online.

That’s it, a tradition a hobby which we learnt, loved and lived to do for the past 20 years was dead.

Yeah back to my village story … Well.. Temples are the highlight here apart from the kites flying. I visited quite a lot …at least to save my life from the excessive hospitality. My 2 days stay did leave me hogging every damn sweet there, every damn snack of Andhra specials, every damn variety of rice specials and unlimited pickles . Few I remember eating were Aarisa, bobbattu , punugulu , cut mirchi, ulava charu , tomato bajji, mirchi bajji , madatha kaja …and cane juice, water melon slices with salt coat .. awesome ..

This is for the guys out there. You get to see awesome desi girls..Damn better than you’re so called “smoking hot “super models. Oh yeah … FYI … I was helped by few young ladies there to get dressed in that traditional wear.

Overall it’s amazing to live the festivity in such soothing, innocent, simple place where everything in the name of culture is preserved with high regard to humanity and of course it is nice to take a day off from the busy schedules.

Well .. What ever I may do in future, how ever busy I might be.
I am sure there will be always time for Sankranthi - the best festival ever.

For the love of the festivity,
Sandiee 

He speaks....

I've been away a while. And I've faced a blitz of complaints. People groan about why I haven't been blogging. They beg me to write. They express their sorrow at the lack of Google Reader updates. Very soon, I foresee a crowd gathering underneath my window with placards and candles, in an attempt to appeal to my sensitive side, just so I write something. I'm here only because I want to save the paper that would have gone into making those placards.

Alright so two people asked me why I haven't been blogging when I have all this free time.

I have been busy consoling one of my friends who had a pretty bitter break up; bitter as bitter as she wanted all the rainbow colors on her boy friend…. Yeh tho hona hi tha..

Since I had been the cupid of their story, I had to be their God father too.. For that I had to skip my lovely shopping too.I guess my friends would be happy about it...

Me: Problem kya hai ?

He speaks:

Problem yeh hai ki woh ladki hai.
aur kya problem hai
Problem is that I expect not to have any problem in my life
But I not having any problem is the biggest problem of her life..

Her Birthday
Her dog’s birthday
Her 1st kiss day... Her 1st school day... her 1st farewell day..
Damn...Almost every day...
Take for example the Batman story only..
Until I become a bat man she is like you do nothing for me...huh...janu...u don love me at all
nakara ho
napunshak ho
When I actually become batman..
She chuckles and says...U became a bat man...I want a normal human being..
How would I be able to live with u?
Then comes the Shopping ka bhoot…
Her shopping is never ending
First take cushion
Then curtain
Cushion, Curtain don't match
Again a cushion!
Trust me...I have so many mugs at home...
I went to set them off…I actually got back my 2 months’ salary...

Every 2 weeks dimag gorge
table lena hai
table lena hai
5 ghante maal bitane par ek sadhi si chappal utha kar layenge
aur fir agale do hafte dimag chatenge
table lena hai
table lena hai...
Ufff…I really have to kill myself for having a mobile..
i love u kahe bina mobile kaata
toh naatak...
If I be a listener..
Am I not interesting to u ? bolke she cries
 Seriously
mein shart laga sakta hoon...

kya soch rahe ho???
 kya soch rahe ho???
Puch puch ke .. She actually irritates me
If at all the girl next to me asks me anything..Done my day...
What, why, how, when...all the questions throw up.
camera laga doon dimag mein...
 Bas use argument starts .. never ends..infact I swear ..old city ladies fighting near the water tap can also never win upon her.

If this is it…The shopping part..the ultimate one…
There was one jhinchaak orange and blue color tie she picked up which is very nice and raucous. But I might have cabin fever for that combo. And she says…
Hey Hun! Try this on. This looks perfect on u !
If at all ..I be lil frank is saying Ah..It looks as if I just puked up a rainbow
Then also she don get it….
Perfect! Now you can even fart Rainbows standing front of me..:P

Damn..haadh hai yaar…
If at all I say the night is dark, she starts making my life colorful as much as a RIN soap ad .. . It's as though I am in a Rin safedi ad and I'm the moron who doesn't use Rin soap.
Love life lacklustre, dorling? Have no fear, I shall be your Rin soap. 

Kuch karo naaaa... bagguuuu...

Well..that was the first time I saw a guy crying.. And this is just an episode 1 1st part .. more to come up...

Frustration is end of all Experiences .

Love ka funda...

Before you can grow up, you must fall in love three times.

Once, you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining your friendship forever. This will teach you who your true friends are, and the fine line between friendship and more.

Once you must fall in love with someone you believe is perfect. You will learn that no one is perfect, and that you should never be treated as anything less than you deserve.

And once, you must fall in love with someone that is exactly like you. This will teach you about who you are, and who you want to be.

And when you’re through with all that, you learn that the people who care about you the most are the ones that you hurt, and the ones that hurt you are the ones that needed you the most.

But most of all, you learn that love is only a concept and is not something that can be defined, it is different to each and every person on this earth, knowing that everyone wants to be loved ... :)

What happens once will never happen again. But what happens twice will surely happen a third time

Bye 2011

It came and it went, and now it's a brand new year. Not sure how I'm feeling today, so feel rather emotionless I guess I could say. Not depressed nor excited just a blah non-feeling state. It was an insane year globally and it was a trying time personally. Back with recharged batteries to bring on the life with a bang. Seriously it was good riddance to 2011 and hello to 2012. I wouldn't have made it through without friends — old and new and of course family. If  I’ve learned nothing else from the past 12 months it’s that the tough times are easiest surrounded by loved ones. And a note that always rang my head …



“When you really want something, sometimes you have to swim a little deeper…
You just can’t give up because things don’t come easy..
You have to come over the obstacles and face your fears..
But at the end, it’s worth a while
Life is all ups and down,
But if you believe in yourself
You will always come through it with flying colors…
Value the emotion ..
Believe in yourself !”


Alright .. now enough of that gyan ..HAPPY NEW YEAR guys ! Bring it on with a bash..

To all my readers, friends and my ex-friends.. and yeah to the guy whom I have encountered in the City mall ...:-D