When heart breaks...then everything sounds mystery

It was difficult at least for me to be calm. Silence within was echoing. For some reason I didn't know what to say; all I could say to have a composed conversation,” I need to call you back “.

Silence conquered!!! Damn silence.

I learnt “actions speak louder than words”. And now I totally understood the essence of it. To my surprise, the reason for that utter silence or put it as the choked conversation; was reflected so clearly.

Yet again, I got that crystal clear… with another profound experience. Words are yet to fade….Some actions always reflect your priorities.

No matter what beautiful phrases or adjectives are used, if you genuinely want to make someone special just make some time for them!!

Slowly I realized that I was distracted from the reality. I couldn't bare the reality -I guess I was slowly - well very slowly accepting it.

Life has come easily to me allowing me to live simply and forget that there are people out there who can be no dears but just mere pretenders. I try to believe that each person in my life is a kind, gentle-hearted but donno why … every time I tend to trust it, my life comes up an experience that proves wrong and once again reality prevails. Probably by now even this little heart started accepting that it is no dear for anyone… no one needs it … no one wants it as a priority but it is just an option  …  no one understands it ….

Well, even I understood that to have me it needs true interest or that excitement I have it for them… But sometimes can’t blame the situations but not the situations created by sluggishness.

So bottom line is … In fact my so called dear people don’t deserve that piece of  me I give them as a special place in my heart ..So lemme keep this drama on with the mere mutuality!

Mistakes cost so heavy when emotions are involved and they merely tear off the hearts for life time! Don't worry... even my hurt heart can honor as before...  

My weak black and whites

I've been utterly tired the last few days to even think of making my little fingers work a tiny ounce to come up with a post....it's called being busy. Although it’s time to take a break but my new discoveries took me back remembering the times I pondered - thought about it.

I am sure everyone has had this moment in life. The ‘so near, yet so far’ one. As the old statement goes, ‘life’s uncertainties are indeed baffling, but that’s what life is all about.’ However, something that’s more annoying than the uncertainty is the fact that they are mostly controlled by others, and we are left with no choice. Say it in the case of the chocolate in the refrigerator to the marriage. The only respite in this: I am not alone...I had something with me and within me that can never be dodged.

It’s the void. It is that difficult situation where I sit there in silence. Silence that is even louder to be deafening....for some reason I do not have a say; but suddenly i tried to utter a few measly words and it stopped at the tip of my tongue. Damn silence. Slowly I recognized that I had to clear my thought cobwebs that distract me. I wanted everything to vanish and to stop in mid-air so i could stay in the world where the black and the white has no discrimination.

I own the me with all the abnormalities ! 

Some aspects come as pause in this not-so-happy experience which is definitely worth reliving. Remember those childhood days when all it took to cheer you up was a long drive in Appa's car or a cycle ride along an unexplored path? The weak hearted me had one of those days today.